I just bought 2 Avocados on Amazon Prime
 

Free shipping. Be here tomorrow by 11am. Cheaper than Hy-Vee and I don’t have to go to the store every 3 days now to get them. Apparently you can buy Blueberries, strawberries and all sorts of perishable shit. You used to have to pay an extra $9.99 or something for Whole Foods to do it. Was free for me.

Bezos you crazy bald bastard. You finally did it.

ya I've used their grocery before

it's okay but prefer Costco or a grocery store. They put like 10 bags of my groceries once on my neighbor's porch which was kind of awkward

The only way that would be awkward is if the "grocery" bananas were dildos

Were they from Mexico?

This is better news than scho order his hookers online

I'm not sure I'm interested in your purchased romances.

You seem like the kind of person who bought a Segway

But is it, though? The world might be a better place if all the loners and dudes too afraid to talk to women could access safe and reliable Amazon hooker delivery. I bet mass shootings and all the incidents where you think “man if only that dude had gotten laid once in a while, he probably wouldn’t be as much of a high strung loser” would drop somewhat. I think we should advocate for this plan *

*- for the record, I am not talking about Scho in the above.

Shove them up your ass

Do you call it Whoredash? Boober? FedXXX? InstaTart?

I cannot wrap my mind around the idea of someone else picking out my produce for me. Or steaks. Or bread. Or really anything, but especially anything where ripeness level/freshness/dates are most important.

We live in a lazy ass society.

Some high class hot looking chicks need to do this service but for groceries.

This hits upon another issue, society’s withdrawal from itself. This minimization of contact with our fellow man is not healthy. And yes, a lot of those mass shooters are indeed loners who are socially withdrawn.

Yeah I imagine those avocados are gonna be useless.

Do you have to squeeze an avocado hourly to check for ripeness