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Old 09-19-2024, 12:14 AM  
Rain Man Rain Man is online now
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I just walked out of a movie for the first time ever.

I walked out of my first movie ever last night. I hated to do it, because it was a "World Premiere" and the director spoke before the airing. It was locally produced.

I'll describe the movie now, fuzzing up some details because it's not my intent to embarrass the director, who seemed nice.

It opened with a an aerial shot of a rivulet of water. Very pretty.

Two minutes later, I was thinking, "Uh, time to move on from this shot."

Then the sound started. It was people doing a chant in monotone notes.

Based on my estimate afterwards, we got 12 minutes of running water and monotonic chants. 12 minutes. Stare at some running water for 12 minutes while ringing your doorbell continuously and you'll see the challenge.

Then the scene switched to an aerial shot of some frozen body of water. One minute, two minutes, .... then the sounds came on, and they were random wildlife sounds. And when I say random, we're talking random. There were dogs barking, for example. Dogs barking while we looked down at the frozen water.

That went on for another 12 minutes or so and nothing on the screen ever moved.

Then we went to the third scene. This one had a boat on a lake, and I thought, "Okay, we're going to start hearing some narration now."

Nope. It was 12+ minutes of the boat sitting on the water, very slowly drifting slightly to the right, which was the most exciting scene of the night to that point.

The sound started for this scene, and it was someone saying sentences. I couldn't tell what was being said, because the director recorded five or six different voices saying the same sentences, and then she offset each voice by half a second. The result was cacophonic noise that was rhythmic enough to be really annoying, and you couldn't understand the words. That went on for almost ten minutes and I finally put my fingers in my ears because it was so annoying. Then she started strobing in bright pictures, still images that flashed so fast that you couldn't tell what the image was. Fast-flashing movie scenes really bother me, so now I had to either cover my eyes or my ears and I needed to cover both. I finally leaned over to my wife and said, "I can't take this any more. I'll wait outside." She decided to go with me and we left.

When we walked out, I looked at my watch and we'd been there for 48 minutes, minus ten minutes for the intro speech. They were still showing the boat on the lake when we left.

I'm fine with avant-garde stuff. It's not always my thing, but I can tolerate it. But this? This was painful. It was essentally 48 minutes of looking at three photos surrounded with nonsensical sounds. I can't figure out how that director put that together and decided that it was ready for the public. I felt like a meanie for walking out when the creator was in the audience, but life is too short for that, man.
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Old 09-19-2024, 12:34 AM   #2
Stewie Stewie is offline
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I don't think I could have lasted that long.

I guess some people think they're Stanley Kubrick when they're closer to Stanley Roper.
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Old 09-19-2024, 02:19 AM   #3
HemiEd HemiEd is offline
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You took it longer than I could have. Was it free I hope?

Sounds like the director has similar taste to these goofy fashion shows that have been going on lately.
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Old 09-19-2024, 05:30 AM   #4
InChiefsHeaven InChiefsHeaven is offline
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So...what was the name of the film? Was it a documentary or like a story?
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Old 09-19-2024, 06:09 AM   #5
Direckshun Direckshun is offline
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I walked out of "World's Greatest Dad." Only time I've ever walked out of a movie.

It was that Robin Williams movie that was advertised as a relatively mischievous romp, but those who have seen the movie know The Scene I'm about to reference.

The events of the movie kick off when Williams walks in on his son having accidentally killed himself by asphyxiation. Williams absolutely crushes the scene, but it is an emotionally devastating scene, that is punctured before and after with a stupid comedy that doesn't do anything.

That scene comes out of nowhere and ruins your damn day. And the movie around it doesn't justify it.

In a more serious drama, I would have forgiven it, I think. But it was so unearned, and Williams sells it so well. I walked out 10 minutes after, when it was clear this was going to be a stupid movie with no point.

Trigger warning:

Spoiler!
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Old 09-19-2024, 08:36 AM   #6
ThrobProng ThrobProng is offline
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Spoiler!
I'm imagining a trailer for that movie.
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Old 09-19-2024, 08:36 AM   #7
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I haven’t walked out of a movie before, but I have damn sure slept through a good amount of crappy movies in a movie theater. They make the seats so much more comfortable now, and it’s honestly been some of the best naps I’ve ever had.
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Old 09-19-2024, 09:35 AM   #8
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The Alexander movie.

The made Alexander the Great gay because Hollywood. I am a huge history buff and Alexander the Great was one of my favorite generals of all time.

Couldn't stand to see how they butchered his story.
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Old 09-19-2024, 10:33 AM   #9
DJJasonp DJJasonp is offline
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I was a film major.

That sounds like a college student film trying way too hard to be ironic.
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Old 09-19-2024, 10:49 AM   #10
BigCatDaddy BigCatDaddy is offline
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The only movie I ever walked out of was Rogue One.
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Old 09-19-2024, 10:52 AM   #11
Buehler445 Buehler445 is offline
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The only movie I ever walked out of was Rogue One.
Did you go back and finish it? I think that movie is excellent.
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Old 09-19-2024, 10:54 AM   #12
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I walked out of Warren Beatty's Dick Tracy back in the day. Just an awful, horrible movie. Fire Me Boy! and I used to get into arguments over that movie, lol.

Beatty so loved the character of Dick Tracy that he went to so pretty wild ends to ensure he maintained the rights to the character.

https://www.indiewire.com/features/g...al-1234809159/
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Old 09-19-2024, 10:55 AM   #13
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I was a film major.

That sounds like a college student film trying way too hard to be ironic.
My initial thought was it was a young filmmaker that became inspired after some type of hallucinogenic trip, lol.
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Old 09-19-2024, 11:27 AM   #14
BigCatDaddy BigCatDaddy is offline
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Did you go back and finish it? I think that movie is excellent.
No, I took exception to the politics in it. I didn't really know what I was walking into.. Just figured some cool Star Wars flick. I'm not up on all of that stuff.... just was bored and went.
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Old 09-19-2024, 11:35 AM   #15
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No, I took exception to the politics in it. I didn't really know what I was walking into.. Just figured some cool Star Wars flick. I'm not up on all of that stuff.... just was bored and went.
The last 30-40 minutes of the movie is what makes it a classic. I say that as a Star Wars nerd, admittedly, but give it a shot just for the climax.
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