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Old 04-28-2021, 10:46 PM  
patteeu patteeu is offline
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I’m leaving forever.

Seriously, I am.


I know what you’re thinking. Maybe I got annoyed by something someone said. Maybe after two Super Bowls in a row I’m satiated on the Chiefs. Maybe I’m going to prison, or joining Dick Cheney on a barnstorming tour, or maybe the antifreeze actually wasn’t a good idea and I died.

The fun of a farewell forever thread is not in knowing the reason. It’s in not knowing, and the mystery behind the disappearance. MrBlond is legendary not because he was here or because he left, but rather because of how he departed. He was DB Cooper jumping out of the Chiefsplanet plane and disappearing into the night, and with that act he became immortal.

It is now my time to parachute from the plane, and I can assure you that I will not return. It would be enjoyable to become an unsolved Chiefsplanet mystery in the process, but I can’t do that to you. It’s cruel enough that you will no longer get to read my thoughtful prose and learn from my wisdom. I can’t allow you to speculate forever about what became of me, and to always wonder if that guy with the fake glasses and mustache sitting next to you at the game is me.

So I’ve instructed one Chiefsplanet member to reveal the mystery. If this thread ever reaches 1,000 posts, that person will share the reason. But until then, you will have only my boarding pass, a flight attendant’s vague description, and 110,871 posts to remember me by.

Farewell, Chiefsplanet!

(Sound of wind rushing past an open passenger cabin door.)


Last edited by DaFace; 05-18-2021 at 03:00 PM..
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Old 05-01-2021, 09:49 AM   #1036
Buehler445 Buehler445 is offline
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Excellent work.

It never occurred to me that the words weren’t his.
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Old 05-01-2021, 09:49 AM   #1037
suzzer99 suzzer99 is offline
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That was a truly epic way to go out. It's really touching that he cared so much about Chiefsplanet to do this. RIP Patteau.
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Old 05-01-2021, 09:59 AM   #1038
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is online now
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Damn. We lost another good one.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:19 AM   #1039
Lzen Lzen is online now
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I just skimmed this thread when first posted. I just thought it was another drama thread and I usually try to avoid that stuff these days. And as I recall, he mostly posted in DC. Nonetheless, patteau was a long time, respected CP member. RIP, Pat.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:20 AM   #1040
Lzen Lzen is online now
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Does anyone know how old he was and when he actually passed?

Edit: his profile says he was 57.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:31 AM   #1041
vailpass vailpass is offline
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It was Patteeu's idea when he knew the end was near. It worked out really well. It was fun. Didnt come off as a scam.He was leaving forever. He would have loved it.
Vintage Pat. Good job you guys. This makes me ****ing sad.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:40 AM   #1042
Lex Luthor Lex Luthor is offline
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I wish I could apologize to Patteeu. I've been an angry douchebag poster here for the last 5 years, and I was pretty much a dick to Patteeu several times in the DC forum.

I stopped posting here a few months ago because I decided I don't want to be that guy anymore. Since Pat won't see my apology, I'll have to settle for apologizing to everyone else. I apologize to you all. I'm really not as much of a dick in real life. Honest.

Rest in peace, Pat. I'm sorry. You were taken far too young.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:43 AM   #1043
vailpass vailpass is offline
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Originally Posted by Lex Luthor View Post
I wish I could apologize to Patteeu. I've been an angry douchebag poster here for the last 5 years, and I was pretty much a dick to Patteeu several times in the DC forum.

I stopped posting here a few months ago because I decided I don't want to be that guy anymore. Since Pat won't see my apology, I'll have to settle for apologizing to everyone else. I apologize to you all. I'm really not as much of a dick in real life. Honest.

Rest in peace, Pat. I'm sorry. You were taken far too young.
Nice words. I highly suspect Pat never took offense to your opposing views. And if being a dick is a crime here everyone but Gaz and Rainman are guilty.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:44 AM   #1044
lcarus lcarus is offline
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We're losing too many people here too often. RIP patteeu
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:51 AM   #1045
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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We're losing too many people here too often. RIP patteeu
Bound to happen man, we're all getting up there
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:57 AM   #1046
Raiderhater Raiderhater is offline
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Bound to happen man, we're all getting up there
Over 20 years going back to the old Star board for some of us. That's a fair chunk of life. I was 19 when this place started up, I'll be 40 next month.
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Old 05-01-2021, 10:58 AM   #1047
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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Does anyone know how old he was and when he actually passed?

Edit: his profile says he was 57.
God have mercy, thats just too damn young

How depressing
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Old 05-01-2021, 11:21 AM   #1048
2bikemike 2bikemike is offline
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Always respected Patteau. Sad day indeed. RIP brother!
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Old 05-01-2021, 11:28 AM   #1049
George Liquor George Liquor is offline
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Old 05-01-2021, 11:30 AM   #1050
vailpass vailpass is offline
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Growing old sucks
Yep. No longer growing old is no bueno either.
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