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Old 04-29-2004, 11:47 PM  
KCChiefsMan KCChiefsMan is offline
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My theory: How to eliminate girls' control over sex

./

Last edited by KCChiefsMan; 04-30-2004 at 12:38 AM..
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KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.KCChiefsMan is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:36 AM   #91
The Bad Guy The Bad Guy is offline
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Normally the guy who brags about getting chicks all the time is normally the same one who is watching Beaches with his "virgin" roomate on a Saturday night.

Guys who get some don't generally broadcast it.
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:38 AM   #92
Phobia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ENDelt260
Gee, thanks Dr. Phil.
You're welcome. I just saved the young guys on ChiefsPlanet hundreds of thousands of dollars in attorney's fees, child support, and alimony due to my wisdom of such issues. All I ask is one percent. If you're one of the young men who have benefited from my vast life experiences, feel free to drop me a PM and I'll happily provide you with my paypal account. FWIW, you don't have to pay me all at once. In fact, I encourage you to get the calculator and determine an exact value of my advice.

Lawyers: $20,000+
Child Support: $1,000 a month until the child graduates college
Alimony: $1,000 a month until the bitch dies or remarries.

Figure it out and send me 1% for the next 20 years. I'm providing a valuable service here.
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:41 AM   #93
Rausch Rausch is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KCChiefsMan
you guys don't like me because I can talk about things that most people would be embarassed to talk about.
You must have me, Frazod, and Phil on ignore...
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"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
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Originally Posted by rico
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:42 AM   #94
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Ad critic account here?

I got some of them mudflaps, you know....the ones with the neked ladies on em?ooooooh mamasita.....

NYA HYA HYA HYA HYA!
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:59 AM   #95
Nzoner Nzoner is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phobia
You're welcome. I just saved the young guys on ChiefsPlanet hundreds of thousands of dollars in attorney's fees, child support, and alimony due to my wisdom of such issues. All I ask is one percent. If you're one of the young men who have benefited from my vast life experiences, feel free to drop me a PM and I'll happily provide you with my paypal account. FWIW, you don't have to pay me all at once. In fact, I encourage you to get the calculator and determine an exact value of my advice.

Lawyers: $20,000+
Child Support: $1,000 a month until the child graduates college
Alimony: $1,000 a month until the bitch dies or remarries.

Figure it out and send me 1% for the next 20 years. I'm providing a valuable service here.
Don't forget bail fees,that advice of telling the cop to uncuff you because there's no law saying you can't destroy your own property is worth something.

Just trying to make sure you get your due.
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Old 04-30-2004, 11:10 AM   #96
ZepSinger ZepSinger is offline
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I am sensing some pent-up hostility in this thread. First, it's good to admit it(denial is not just a river in Egypt)!

Step 2- in order to heal our inner child, we must learn to 'own' our anger. Then, we really should consider some 12-step anger management.

Just try not to go into a shame spiral- and always remember, only YOU can take care of you.
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Last edited by ZepSinger; 04-30-2004 at 11:18 AM..
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ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.ZepSinger must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
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Old 04-30-2004, 11:13 AM   #97
Phobia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nzoner 338
Don't forget bail fees,that advice of telling the cop to uncuff you because there's no law saying you can't destroy your own property is worth something.

Just trying to make sure you get your due.
You're right, but why quibble over a few cents here and there. I'm only asking for 1%. There's not a better deal that can be achieved anywhere on earth. For 1 penny on the dollar, I'll be your father and ensure you aren't financially destitute by age 30. You can't get that by watching Oprah nor Dr. Phil.
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Old 04-30-2004, 11:15 AM   #98
Calcountry Calcountry is offline
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Originally Posted by Wile_E_Coyote
this thread was brought to you, by the friendly folks at PETA
Your sig pic would be much better if it was animated. I stared at if for a few seconds hoping the mallet would come down and go thud. Darn.

Kind of like this Fishing guy
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Old 04-30-2004, 11:26 AM   #99
Talisman Talisman is offline
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This thread is comedy gold. I'll just throw out a few of these: You can all share them.
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Old 04-30-2004, 12:24 PM   #100
grandllama grandllama is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KCChiefsMan
I know, not a single one of you guys have ever jacked off in your lives, none of you guys have gotten drunk and said or did something stupid.

Nothing bad ever happens to you guys, your lives are GREAT!

How dare you put these activities in the category of 'bad things'

They happen to be the highlight of my life, and are the very things that make my life GREAT!
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Old 04-30-2004, 01:05 PM   #101
Ultra Peanut Ultra Peanut is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ndbbm
I like to just stare blankly at a woman in a bar until they say "What are you looking at"...To which I reply, "Well, I'm going to have sex with you tonight, so you might as well be there for it." yeah...I can see this lamer has a .2 rating on the mack scale.
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Old 04-30-2004, 01:06 PM   #102
Ultra Peanut Ultra Peanut is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grandllama
How dare you put these activities in the category of 'bad things'

They happen to be the highlight of my life, and are the very things that make my life GREAT!
True dat.
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Old 04-30-2004, 01:36 PM   #103
LVNHACK LVNHACK is offline
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This thread has some good laughs in it...........



I don't remember whose sig it was but it went like this......




Anything stated on the Planet can come back to haunt you.........
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LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.
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Old 04-30-2004, 01:47 PM   #104
COchief COchief is offline
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Without reading this entire thread...may I suggest that you turn gay? That would eliminate you from having to deal with the bitches. After seeing the pictures of you and your Gucci sunglasses twin, I would say you two are only a couple of cocktails away from it anyways.

/Here to help
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Old 04-30-2004, 01:50 PM   #105
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I used to have a sig that said something like "you have the right to remain silent, anything you post on the planet can and will be used against you at another time"...
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