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Be Kind To Your Pets
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Glorious Independence, MO
Casino cash: $16996178
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This Week's Important Florida News!
Two Boffo Stories:
Story One: Man arrested for giving wicked wedgies, or snuggies, or melvyns, or whatever you call pulling the underwear over a nerd's head. Story Two: Fifty Year Old School Teacher Gets Tanked on Cheap Wine, wrecks her van, offers to blow the cop if he lets her go. Florida, I love you. You're just so fun! Story #1: Charles Ross is known for orchestrating outrageous pranks and posting them to Youtube. But this time, the 18-year-old prankster may have gone a step too far. Ross was arrested for battery Sunday night after he allegedly gave a series of wedgies to moviegoers outside the Carmike Royal Palm 20 in Bradenton, Fla., while a friend filmed the prank, the Bradenton Herald reports. The underwear prank, which Gawker calls a "wedgie spree," ended badly for Ross when a 20-year-old male victim reported to authorities that Ross grabbed him "by the back of his pants and pulled them up hard," according to the Smoking Gun. Although other victims of the schoolyard prank also came forward, the 20-year-old is the only one seeking charges. On his Youtube channel, Ross has uploaded video footage of him performing a variety of pranks -- from doing handstands over people to trying out pick-up lines -- but the latest in his compilation is by far one of his most hands-on public displays. According to the police report obtained by the Smoking Gun, Ross challenged the male victim following the wedgie, "asking if he wanted to hit him." The Mantee County Sheriff's Office arrested Ross and detained him overnight. He was released on $750 bail, records show, and his court date is set for Feb. 14. Though Ross' wedgie spree was meant in jest, this is not the first time someone has been arrested for doling out the uncomfortable underwear gag. In 2006, an Albany, N.Y., teacher was arrested for endangering the welfare of a child after allegedly giving a 10-year-old student a wedgie during summer school. http://www.manateesheriff.com/Public...px?ID=10125392 Story #2: 'A' for effort? Middle school math teacher Mary Maloney allegedly offered oral sex to a police officer after being nabbed for a hit-and-run in Palm Beach County, Fla. Maloney, 53, was arrested Sunday after she crashed her van into a pickup truck around 8:35 p.m., then took off, according to an arrest report obtained by the Sun Sentinel. A witness to the crash tracked Maloney's car to a parking spot and then called police. The arresting officer said he found an empty gallon jug of wine behind Maloney's driver's seat and "immediately smelled the strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from her person," according to WPTV. The report states that her eyes were glassy, bloodshot, and partially closed. The officer that drove Maloney to the police station noted that she asked him "How much do I need to pay you to just let me go? Don't you understand I am a school teacher?" She then allegedly offered to perform oral sex on him and allow him to fondle her breasts. Maloney was charged with driving under the influence, leaving the scene of a crash with damage, resisting an officer without violence, driving with a suspended license and attempted bribery of a public servant. |
Posts: 40,996
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#1021 |
New and Improved
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Springfield, Mo.
Casino cash: $-1471410
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Should have played through.
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“As a nation, we can endure damaging policies for a four-year term. But we cannot survive a president willing to terminate our Constitution”
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Posts: 22,224
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#1022 |
SuperChiefs
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Florida
Casino cash: $-730178
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Can confirm! Idiots that retire to Florida (in particular new yorkers) act like the same jagoffs they were before they moved here.
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Posts: 21,752
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#1023 |
Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Here
Casino cash: $-1267525
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HA!!! The fat guy tried a hiatsu kick to the chest and fell on his ass. It was game over at that point!
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I haven’t slept for ten days straight… because that would be way too long. |
Posts: 3,747
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#1024 |
Life is changing..
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: NW Missouri
Casino cash: $-1670000
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Posts: 42,877
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#1025 |
Veteran
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Here
Casino cash: $-1267525
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I know, and I just kept watching it over and over!
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I haven’t slept for ten days straight… because that would be way too long. |
Posts: 3,747
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#1026 | |
On Hiatus
Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $-410300
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Quote:
I am one of those people who retired here in Florida. Pretty sure idiocy is not indigenous to people who come here to retire. |
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Posts: 12,098
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#1027 |
Supporter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Who knows?
Casino cash: $-54116
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That tree is amazing.
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Posts: 87,888
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#1028 |
SuperChiefs
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Florida
Casino cash: $-730178
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Posts: 21,752
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#1029 | |
On Hiatus
Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $-410300
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Quote:
I was more addressing your silly generalization that anyone who retired to Florida who didn't grow up here were idiots. But carry on.... |
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Posts: 12,098
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#1030 |
(Sir/Yes Sir/Aye Aye Sir)
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Diving
Casino cash: $1415380
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Asshole: I'm in a hurry, I need t play through..
Me (waiting on groups in front of me too (and no marshall to be found)): Oh yay, I love having a target!
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. #Like 45, 47 Is Going To Be AWESOME! #I still don't have COVID #I'mImmuneToVirtueSignaling ![]() |
Posts: 121,264
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#1031 |
Has a particular set of skills
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: On the water
Casino cash: $108962
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I moved for a 50% raise from the KC market. Since doubled again. Bought a house before the boom made prices ridiculous. Now, I'm a year or two from retirement. Been another decade if I'd stayed in KC. Miss going to every game but Florida man notwithstanding, its a great place to live.
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Mahomes is not a game manager. Release the Kraken. |
Posts: 80,941
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#1032 |
Suupraa Geniuuusss
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: North Phoenix, AZ
Casino cash: $-1039600
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Lol, I mean, I’m speechless. You think FL news can’t get any weirder, and then they literally go “ hold my beer.”
https://www.wcjb.com/2023/05/24/man-...roommate-neck/
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“Some ideas are so stupid only intellectuals believe them.”- George Orwell Steven "Spags" Spagnuolo is my Adopt-A-Chief!!! ![]() Last edited by Megatron96; 05-25-2023 at 02:11 PM.. |
Posts: 34,549
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#1033 |
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
Casino cash: $10113829
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Linky no worky
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Posts: 39,567
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#1034 |
Suupraa Geniuuusss
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: North Phoenix, AZ
Casino cash: $-1039600
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“Some ideas are so stupid only intellectuals believe them.”- George Orwell Steven "Spags" Spagnuolo is my Adopt-A-Chief!!! ![]() |
Posts: 34,549
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#1035 | |
In Search of a Life
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Kansas
Casino cash: $228994
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Posts: 23,595
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