The 10pm thread (archived) - Page 550

crazycoffey · 11:34 PM

The big anti-hijack thread.....
Talk about anything, but if this works than we don't have to keep looking around all the threads to see who is still on tonight, and every night, or even every day! Talk about the chiefs, talk about tomorrow, talk about football, politics or even how to do flooring and the applicable budget. What you're drinking, how hard it is to sleep, etc. Every thing is acceptable in this thread.....

http://www.timeanddate.com/worldcloc...om.html?sort=2 see for yourself, it is ten o'clock somewhere.

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 09:51 PM

Q: Why did the blonde nurse bring a red marker to work?
A: In case she had to draw blood!

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 09:52 PM

Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!

el borracho · 02-08-2007, 09:53 PM

PinkFloyd · 02-08-2007, 09:53 PM

What does a coke machine and Monica Lewinsky have in common ???

They both accept "bills" !!!!

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 09:54 PM

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.

Q: What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have?
A: One that never misses a period.

Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists?
A: The rest are hunt'n peckers.

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!" In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"

The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?"
"I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.

PinkFloyd · 02-08-2007, 09:56 PM

Dear God !!! What have I started here ???

el borracho · 02-08-2007, 09:57 PM

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 10:00 PM

Q: How do you tell if a bleach blonde did your landscaping?
A: The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.

Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
A: Because she got an "F" in sex.

munkey · 02-08-2007, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by el borracho

WTF?

PinkFloyd · 02-08-2007, 10:05 PM

A blonde got fired at an M&M's factory...

She kept eatting all the W's.........

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 10:06 PM

Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.

Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.

Q: What is a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Humpme Dumpme!

Q: What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg?
A: Nothing. They've never met.
A: Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.

Q: What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"?
A: They know how many men went down on "The Titanic".

Did you hear the one about the blonde who thought that "love handles" referred to her ears?

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 10:07 PM

BLONDE TERMINOLOGY

Anally -- occurring yearly
Artery -- study of paintings
Bacteria -- back door of cafeteria
Barium -- what doctors do when treatment fails
Bowel -- letter like A.E.I.O.U
Caesarian section -- district in Rome
Cat scan -- searching for kitty
Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her
Colic -- sheep dog
Coma -- a punctuation mark
Congenital -- friendly
D&C -- where Washington is
Diarrhea -- journal of daily events
Dilate -- to live long
Enema -- not a friend
Fester -- quicker
Fibula -- a small lie
Genital -- non-Jewish
G.I. Series -- soldiers' ball game
Grippe -- suitcase
Hangnail -- coat hook
Impotent -- distinguished, well known
Intense pain -- torture in a teepee
Labour pain -- got hurt at work
Medical staff -- doctor's cane
Morbid -- higher offer
Nitrate -- cheaper than day rate
Node -- was aware of
Outpatient -- person who had fainted
Pap smear -- fatherhood test
Pelvis -- cousin of Elvis
Post operative -- letter carrier
Protein -- favouring young people
Rectum -- damn near killed 'em
Recovery room -- place to do upholstery
Rheumatic -- amorous
Scar -- rolled tobacco leaf
Secretion -- hiding anything
Seizure -- Roman emperor
Serology -- study of knighthood
Tablet -- small tablet
Terminal Illness -- sickness at airport
Tibia -- country in North Africa
Tumor -- an extra pair
Urine -- opposite of you're out
Varicose -- located nearby
Vein -- conceited

PinkFloyd · 02-08-2007, 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Simplex3

BLONDE TERMINOLOGY

Anally -- occurring yearly
Artery -- study of paintings
Bacteria -- back door of cafeteria
Barium -- what doctors do when treatment fails
Bowel -- letter like A.E.I.O.U
Caesarian section -- district in Rome
Cat scan -- searching for kitty
Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her
Colic -- sheep dog
Coma -- a punctuation mark
Congenital -- friendly
D&C -- where Washington is
Diarrhea -- journal of daily events
Dilate -- to live long
Enema -- not a friend
Fester -- quicker
Fibula -- a small lie
Genital -- non-Jewish
G.I. Series -- soldiers' ball game
Grippe -- suitcase
Hangnail -- coat hook
Impotent -- distinguished, well known
Intense pain -- torture in a teepee
Labour pain -- got hurt at work
Medical staff -- doctor's cane
Morbid -- higher offer
Nitrate -- cheaper than day rate
Node -- was aware of
Outpatient -- person who had fainted
Pap smear -- fatherhood test
Pelvis -- cousin of Elvis
Post operative -- letter carrier
Protein -- favouring young people
Rectum -- damn near killed 'em
Recovery room -- place to do upholstery
Rheumatic -- amorous
Scar -- rolled tobacco leaf
Secretion -- hiding anything
Seizure -- Roman emperor
Serology -- study of knighthood
Tablet -- small tablet
Terminal Illness -- sickness at airport
Tibia -- country in North Africa
Tumor -- an extra pair
Urine -- opposite of you're out
Varicose -- located nearby
Vein -- conceited

OK... YOU WIN !!!!

Simplex3 · 02-08-2007, 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pinkfloyd

OK... YOU WIN !!!!

Never f**k with me. You can't win.

PinkFloyd · 02-08-2007, 10:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Simplex3

Never f**k with me. You can't win.

Let's go bowling !!!

01-05-2007, 10:00 PM
crazycoffey .......... Join Date: Dec 2006 Casino cash: $4537901	The 10pm thread (archived) The big anti-hijack thread..... Talk about anything, but if this works than we don't have to keep looking around all the threads to see who is still on tonight, and every night, or even every day! Talk about the chiefs, talk about tomorrow, talk about football, politics or even how to do flooring and the applicable budget. What you're drinking, how hard it is to sleep, etc. Every thing is acceptable in this thread..... http://www.timeanddate.com/worldcloc...om.html?sort=2 see for yourself, it is ten o'clock somewhere. Last edited by DaFace; 01-10-2013 at 11:34 PM..
Posts: 28,375

02-08-2007, 09:51 PM	#8236
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	Q: Why did the blonde nurse bring a red marker to work? A: In case she had to draw blood!
Posts: 28,527

02-08-2007, 09:52 PM	#8237
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders? A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
Posts: 28,527

02-08-2007, 09:53 PM	#8238
el borracho In Pat We Trust Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Albuquerque, NM Casino cash: $4459148
Posts: 12,018

02-08-2007, 09:53 PM	#8239
PinkFloyd I've Become - Comfortably Numb Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Cameron, Missouri Casino cash: $10003795	What does a coke machine and Monica Lewinsky have in common ??? They both accept "bills" !!!! __________________ Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Posts: 3,089

02-08-2007, 09:54 PM	#8240
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once. Q: What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have? A: One that never misses a period. Q: Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists? A: The rest are hunt'n peckers. A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!" In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?" "I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.
Posts: 28,527

02-08-2007, 09:56 PM	#8241
PinkFloyd I've Become - Comfortably Numb Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Cameron, Missouri Casino cash: $10003795	Dear God !!! What have I started here ??? __________________ Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Posts: 3,089

02-08-2007, 09:57 PM	#8242
el borracho In Pat We Trust Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Albuquerque, NM Casino cash: $4459148
Posts: 12,018

02-08-2007, 10:00 PM	#8243
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	Q: How do you tell if a bleach blonde did your landscaping? A: The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard. Q: Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? A: Because she got an "F" in sex.
Posts: 28,527

02-08-2007, 10:05 PM	#8245
PinkFloyd I've Become - Comfortably Numb Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Cameron, Missouri Casino cash: $10003795	A blonde got fired at an M&M's factory... She kept eatting all the W's......... __________________ Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
Posts: 3,089

02-08-2007, 10:06 PM	#8246
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	Q: How do blonde brain cells die? A: Alone. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. Q: What is a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme? A: Humpme Dumpme! Q: What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg? A: Nothing. They've never met. A: Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money. Q: What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"? A: They know how many men went down on "The Titanic". Did you hear the one about the blonde who thought that "love handles" referred to her ears?
Posts: 28,527

02-08-2007, 10:07 PM	#8247
Simplex3 MVP Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $10004900	BLONDE TERMINOLOGY Anally -- occurring yearly Artery -- study of paintings Bacteria -- back door of cafeteria Barium -- what doctors do when treatment fails Bowel -- letter like A.E.I.O.U Caesarian section -- district in Rome Cat scan -- searching for kitty Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her Colic -- sheep dog Coma -- a punctuation mark Congenital -- friendly D&C -- where Washington is Diarrhea -- journal of daily events Dilate -- to live long Enema -- not a friend Fester -- quicker Fibula -- a small lie Genital -- non-Jewish G.I. Series -- soldiers' ball game Grippe -- suitcase Hangnail -- coat hook Impotent -- distinguished, well known Intense pain -- torture in a teepee Labour pain -- got hurt at work Medical staff -- doctor's cane Morbid -- higher offer Nitrate -- cheaper than day rate Node -- was aware of Outpatient -- person who had fainted Pap smear -- fatherhood test Pelvis -- cousin of Elvis Post operative -- letter carrier Protein -- favouring young people Rectum -- damn near killed 'em Recovery room -- place to do upholstery Rheumatic -- amorous Scar -- rolled tobacco leaf Secretion -- hiding anything Seizure -- Roman emperor Serology -- study of knighthood Tablet -- small tablet Terminal Illness -- sickness at airport Tibia -- country in North Africa Tumor -- an extra pair Urine -- opposite of you're out Varicose -- located nearby Vein -- conceited
Posts: 28,527