I’m leaving forever. - Page 44

patteeu · 03:00 PM

Quote:

Mod note: Here is the follow-up to this thread.

Seriously, I am.

I know what you’re thinking. Maybe I got annoyed by something someone said. Maybe after two Super Bowls in a row I’m satiated on the Chiefs. Maybe I’m going to prison, or joining Dick Cheney on a barnstorming tour, or maybe the antifreeze actually wasn’t a good idea and I died.

The fun of a farewell forever thread is not in knowing the reason. It’s in not knowing, and the mystery behind the disappearance. MrBlond is legendary not because he was here or because he left, but rather because of how he departed. He was DB Cooper jumping out of the Chiefsplanet plane and disappearing into the night, and with that act he became immortal.

It is now my time to parachute from the plane, and I can assure you that I will not return. It would be enjoyable to become an unsolved Chiefsplanet mystery in the process, but I can’t do that to you. It’s cruel enough that you will no longer get to read my thoughtful prose and learn from my wisdom. I can’t allow you to speculate forever about what became of me, and to always wonder if that guy with the fake glasses and mustache sitting next to you at the game is me.

So I’ve instructed one Chiefsplanet member to reveal the mystery. If this thread ever reaches 1,000 posts, that person will share the reason. But until then, you will have only my boarding pass, a flight attendant’s vague description, and 110,871 posts to remember me by.

Farewell, Chiefsplanet!

(Sound of wind rushing past an open passenger cabin door.)

**Donger** · 04-30-2021, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pawnmower

Ricky Fowler, plow her.

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:25 PM

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Originally Posted by Tonka83

By the age of 5, the boy the boy was reading the bible and chopping wood for the fire. Despite the father's harsh character, the boy loved him and thought of him as his true father.

3

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

By the age of seven the father raped him three times. The boy ran away. He survived four days in the desert by eating cactus and scorpions. He was finally found by a drug cartel boss, who took the boy in. Mr. Sanchez was his name, and he was immediately impressed by the boys intelligence and grown up attitude. Mr. Sanchez provided the boy with an education at a private prep school and a nice house.

4

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

The boy had sex for the first time when he was 12, the next year he graduated high school. He was the school's star running back. The boy was lost, although he liked Mr. Sanchez, he never thought of him as his father. The boy went to India, were he became a spiritual leader of a large tribe of farmers. With his power he turned the several plots that each tribe member had into a large corporate farm and became a millionaire. His assets grew as he bought into other successful start ups. He often got ahead in business with his great leadership abilities, but once in a while he used violence. This was India after all.

5

**Rain Man** · 04-30-2021, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bearcat

Why Waste Time When Few Word Do Trick GIF from Whywastetime GIFs

I kind of think that this is the best line in television history.

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

By the time he was 22, the boy had all the money he would ever need. So he bought a yacht and traveled the world for 10 years. For 10 years he visited every major port, slept with girls from every country imaginable, and tried every drug ever made (by nature and by man).

6

LiveSteam · 04-30-2021, 02:29 PM

Mr. DONGER
What went on in your head?
Oh, Mr. DONGER
Did you talk to the dead?

Your lifestyle to me seems so tragic
With the thrill of it all
You fooled all the people with ? & magic
Yeah, you waited on PATTEEU to call

Mr. Charming
Did you think you were pure?
Mr. Alarming
In nocturnal rapport

Uncovering things that were sacred
Manifest on this Earth

Oh, conceived in the eye of a secret
Yeah, and they scattered the afterbirth

MR.DONGER
Won't you ride my white horse?
Mr. DONGER
It's symbolic, of course

Approaching a time that is classic
I hear that maiden's call
Approaching a time that is drastic
Standing with their backs to the wall
Was it polemically sent?
I wanna know what you meant
I wanna know
I wanna know what you meant.

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

When he was 33, he was walking on a beach in French Guiana when he met a girl of Irish - Native American decent. She bared his seed. It was boy, perfect health. He moved them to Argentina, then London, and eventually Vermont.

7

**Donger** · 04-30-2021, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LiveSteam

Mr. DONGER
What went on in your head?
Oh, Mr. DONGER
Did you talk to the dead?

Your lifestyle to me seems so tragic
With the thrill of it all
You fooled all the people with ? & magic
Yeah, you waited on PATTEEU to call

Mr. Charming
Did you think you were pure?
Mr. Alarming
In nocturnal rapport

Uncovering things that were sacred
Manifest on this Earth

Oh, conceived in the eye of a secret
Yeah, and they scattered the afterbirth

MR.DONGER
Won't you ride my white horse?
Mr. DONGER
It's symbolic, of course

Approaching a time that is classic
I hear that maiden's call
Approaching a time that is drastic
Standing with their backs to the wall
Was it polemically sent?
I wanna know what you meant
I wanna know
I wanna know what you meant.

Are those song lyrics?

**BigRedChief** · 04-30-2021, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scho63

While I certainly do appreciate the post barrage, it wouldn't hurt ya to toss in a photo of Paige every once in a while now would it?

It’s been a couple of hundred posts. The Paige is overdue.

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

The man was 45 now, he has seen everything, accomplished everything, tried everything. He skied down the Swiss Alps, been at the North Pole, swam with hammerheads, everything! Yet he has never done one simple thing that we all take for granted every day, he met his father. He never played catch with his father, he never talked about women with his father. He never would.

8

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

He died at the age of 63 when his parachute didn?t open when he was base jumping from Dagger Mountain in Washington, USA. Over three thousand people attended his funeral.

9

ToxSocks · 04-30-2021, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bearcat

Why also?

Because.

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonka83

I know what you are thinking. How does this story relate to me? Well I want you to go all the way back to the beginning of the story and remember the woman who gave birth to this incredible boy. You are like this woman. You are like this women because you are a whore. And we are ten posts closer to 1000

FYP

**luv** · 04-30-2021, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bearcat

We would be like 8 posts closer if you had spread that out a bit.

Ten posts. You're welcome.

04-30-2021, 02:29 PM	#652
LiveSteam The Constitutional Choo choo Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: homeof43conferencetitles Casino cash: $115432	Mr. DONGER What went on in your head? Oh, Mr. DONGER Did you talk to the dead? Your lifestyle to me seems so tragic With the thrill of it all You fooled all the people with ? & magic Yeah, you waited on PATTEEU to call Mr. Charming Did you think you were pure? Mr. Alarming In nocturnal rapport Uncovering things that were sacred Manifest on this Earth Oh, conceived in the eye of a secret Yeah, and they scattered the afterbirth MR.DONGER Won't you ride my white horse? Mr. DONGER It's symbolic, of course Approaching a time that is classic I hear that maiden's call Approaching a time that is drastic Standing with their backs to the wall Was it polemically sent? I wanna know what you meant I wanna know I wanna know what you meant. __________________ Progressivism.. The Politically Correct way of saying "I'm a Communist slash Nazi" depending on what the issue of the day is?
Posts: 44,537