Home Discord Chat
Go Back   ChiefsPlanet > Hall of Classics
Register FAQDonate Members List Calendar

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Hammock Parties's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $2720478
I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
Posts: 289,084
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-20-2014, 09:33 PM   #301
Stanley Nickels Stanley Nickels is offline
[null]
 

Join Date: Sep 2008
Casino cash: $2190893
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
Just ate bean soup. My guts are gurglin' and quiverin' like a virgin on prom night.
__________________
Bacon-wrapped shrimp: My first-favorite food wrapped around my third-favorite food. I'd go to a banquet in honor of those Somali pirates if they served bacon-wrapped shrimp.
Posts: 6,652
Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.Stanley Nickels is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-20-2014, 10:06 PM   #302
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Hammock Parties's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $2720478
#4 was a massive gas explosion with a tiny, solid chunk of excrement.

Kinda fun. I'd pay for a predator-vision replay of that shit. It honestly felt ****ing HUGE. But it was just the gas.


Last edited by Hammock Parties; 05-20-2014 at 10:19 PM..
Posts: 289,084
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-20-2014, 10:11 PM   #303
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Hammock Parties's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $2720478
5 total bowel movements over six days. I think I'm caught up now? Can it be not shitting time for awhile, Lord?
Posts: 289,084
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-20-2014, 10:13 PM   #304
BigRedChief BigRedChief is offline
Has a particular set of skills
 
BigRedChief's Avatar
 

Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: On the water
Casino cash: $1098962
VARSITY
Quote:
Originally Posted by htismaqe View Post
That's it.
This thread merit Hall of Classics consideration yet?

If not why not, it has all the key pieces that make a thread hall worthy.
__________________
Mind you own damn business
Posts: 80,212
BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.BigRedChief is obviously part of the inner Circle.
Thumbs Up 1 Thumbs Down 0     Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 05:16 AM   #305
TribalElder TribalElder is offline
Arrowhead Trail of Tears
 
TribalElder's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: KansasCity
Casino cash: $820441
The thread is kind of shitty, that's why
Posts: 29,381
TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 05:18 AM   #306
bevischief bevischief is offline
....
 
bevischief's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere Kansas
Casino cash: $8239352
VARSITY
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
Just ate bean soup. My guts are gurglin' and quiverin' like a virgin on prom night.
Teaspoon of baking soda takes cares of the gas.
Posts: 27,753
bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 06:44 AM   #307
penguinz penguinz is offline
Supporter
 
penguinz's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2003
Casino cash: $1677626
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian View Post
I can help you test the theory....

Go to Wal-Mart and buy the already prepared 2 liter bottle of Grape Kool-Aid. Spend the next 2 days drinking nothing but that with your meals.

You will spend the next 2 days wondering if all you ate was lettuce and broccoli.
Only two litres of fluids in two days? That is less than you should have in a day even if you are not active.
__________________
Posts: 17,177
penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.penguinz threw an interception on a screen pass.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 06:52 AM   #308
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
'Tis my eye!
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $9719900
Quote:
Originally Posted by bevischief View Post
Teaspoon of baking soda takes cares of the gas.
If he's suffering from excessive acid, eating baking soda will create excess gas.
Posts: 100,315
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 07:41 AM   #309
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
Space Cadet and Aczabel
 
Dave Lane's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Kanab, UT, USA
Casino cash: $9333275
VARSITY
Quote:
Originally Posted by eDave View Post
Grape soda?
Purple drank...
__________________
Thanks, Trump for the civics lesson. We are learning so much about RICO, espionage, sedition, impeachment, the 25th Amendment, order of succession, nepotism, separation of powers, 1st Amendment, obstruction of justice, the emoluments clause, conflicts of interest, collusion, sanctions, oligarchs, money laundering and so much more.
Posts: 40,584
Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dave Lane is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 07:54 AM   #310
Pasta Little Brioni Pasta Little Brioni is offline
Consuming CP souls
 

Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: U.S.A.
Casino cash: $2028880
Should have left to go take a dump during speed dating
Posts: 71,902
Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 08:12 AM   #311
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Hammock Parties's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2002
Casino cash: $2720478
Quote:
Originally Posted by htismaqe View Post
If he's suffering from excessive acid, eating baking soda will create excess gas.
What are you a ****ing chemist?
Posts: 289,084
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 08:15 AM   #312
Pasta Little Brioni Pasta Little Brioni is offline
Consuming CP souls
 

Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: U.S.A.
Casino cash: $2028880
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
What are you a ****ing chemist?
Pothead
Posts: 71,902
Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Little Brioni is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 08:50 AM   #313
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
'Tis my eye!
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $9719900
Quote:
Originally Posted by PGM View Post
Pothead
Same thing, right?
Posts: 100,315
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 11:13 AM   #314
CleveSteve CleveSteve is offline
Veteran
 
CleveSteve's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Pflugerville, TX
Casino cash: $10010636
Thank you to all the participants of this thread. My fav CP thread since "Draw something fast" and the diarrhea elephant.
Posts: 1,150
CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.CleveSteve must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
    Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2014, 11:14 AM   #315
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
'Tis my eye!
 
htismaqe's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Casino cash: $9719900
Quote:
Originally Posted by CleveSteve View Post
Thank you to all the participants of this thread. My fav CP thread since "Draw something fast" and the diarrhea elephant.
We aim to please.
Posts: 100,315
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:38 PM.


This is a test for a client's site.
Fort Worth Texas Process Servers
Covering Arlington, Fort Worth, Grand Prairie and surrounding communities.
Tarrant County, Texas and Johnson County, Texas.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.