|
08-21-2004, 08:28 PM | #271 |
Supporter
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Utopia
Casino cash: $3438454
|
Sorry I missed this.
1. ask your dad.(serious) 2. If you are a raider fan.....the obvious answer is to drop 2 GHB pills in her soda and wait until she goes to sleep. 3. It may take some practice, but once you've figure it out.....calmly pour yourself a drink, turn on the "top gun" soundtrack, plop down on the sofa and say "hey bebeh, this dick isn't going to suck itself." If you're successful, my best advice is to "find the soybean".....and "don't stab the soup, stir it slowly" until you learn the right way to cook....oh yeah...and you might want to rub one out a couple hours before....so you don't shoot yourself in the foot. Go easy on the BRUTE by fabragee....and don't put any old spice on your tinkler. Last edited by Iowanian; 08-21-2004 at 08:35 PM.. |
Posts: 62,289
|
08-21-2004, 08:29 PM | #272 | |
**** the Raiders
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: A Webb of chaos
Casino cash: $322021
|
Quote:
And here we have perfect example of how Phil tends to embellish and exaggerate in his posts.
__________________
"Serious sport has nothing to do with fair play. It is bound up with hatred, jealousy, boastfulness, and disregard of all the rules." -- George Orwell, Shooting an Elephant |
|
Posts: 29,014
|
08-21-2004, 08:42 PM | #273 | |
Feloniously Restrained
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: MO
Casino cash: $10004900
|
Quote:
That's how KCMizzou taught ME to get puzzay as well!
__________________
"Blah blah blah blahhhh” |
|
Posts: 5,171
|
08-21-2004, 08:50 PM | #274 |
A certain set of skills
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: texas
Casino cash: $10026683
VARSITY
|
A few of the basics have not been addressed in this so let me get you started before the big date.
First take a shower and use deodourant and a decent cologne. Don't put it on heavy. Brush your teeth and use a mouth wash. Always take a peppermint or spearmint gum or breath equivalent with you. After you eat always take one and offer it to the girl. I prefer not gum products, as chewing all the time is doesn't do anything for you. If she takes your breath product you offer thats always a good sign. Nothing will turn a girl off faster then bad breath, always presume after you eat anything your breath will smell, thats why you should carry breath mints. Hygiene lesson over. |
Posts: 25,265
|
08-21-2004, 09:09 PM | #275 |
Hey Teacher!
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: land of maple syrup
Casino cash: $9902559
|
alright! I'll give this a shot. I'm probably gonna get laughed at anyway and critized, not that I care. Are you ready shark lovers? Probably a few of you r anxious enough to hear what I'm gonna say. Ok, anyway I'll get to the point, you wanna have sex with this one? I would be damn right honest about tha whole fucking thing! No fuck'n head games, none of this flirting b*llsh*t, no fucking pick-up lines. Just be yourself, fuck! Get the right timing on this one. Try and find a good setting with her first. Once you get the setting down pack, your all settled in with her, prime her up like you want her to feel horny about you. Once you mastered that, then just be honest, something simple like "hey, I'm very attracted to you. I can't help myself right now, I'm feeling very horny, are you? If she says yes. Well then, do you happen to be in the mood for some sexual intercourse? Cause I am". Don't ask her to fuck right off the bat it's one of the biggest mistakes and it's stupid. Unless, of course, she says so.
if she says she not feeling horny, then you'll have to catch her another day. *BTW, if it works, great! If not, then who gives a fuck! Move on, get the next one, or go home alone, and yes jerking off is always an option. |
Posts: 5,513
|
08-21-2004, 09:40 PM | #276 | |
Seize life. Be an ermine.
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: My house
Casino cash: $1408491
VARSITY
|
Quote:
__________________
Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history. |
|
Posts: 143,154
|
08-21-2004, 09:46 PM | #277 | |
A certain set of skills
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: texas
Casino cash: $10026683
VARSITY
|
Quote:
Pick up a porno mag . It should be of some help. |
|
Posts: 25,265
|
08-21-2004, 10:16 PM | #278 | |
The Dude Abides
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Dakota Country
Casino cash: $4234285
|
Quote:
__________________
"I've always said I worry about legacy and winning rings more than making money at this moment...We see what's going on around the league, but at the same time, I'll never do anything that's going to hurt us from keeping the great players around me.” |
|
Posts: 46,820
|
08-21-2004, 10:17 PM | #279 | |
Guest
Casino cash: $
|
Quote:
Hugs |
|
Posts: n/a
|
08-21-2004, 11:32 PM | #280 | |
**** the Raiders
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: A Webb of chaos
Casino cash: $322021
|
Quote:
And just remember Roy, gobricks here is the one who paid a whore $500 to screw his friend..... And then his friend never paid him back.
__________________
"Serious sport has nothing to do with fair play. It is bound up with hatred, jealousy, boastfulness, and disregard of all the rules." -- George Orwell, Shooting an Elephant |
|
Posts: 29,014
|
08-21-2004, 11:36 PM | #281 |
Guest
Casino cash: $
|
Yeah. More advice for Roy.
If bricks happens to post on this thread, you should do the opposite of whatever he says. |
Posts: n/a
|
08-21-2004, 11:38 PM | #282 | |
Most Valuable Poster
Join Date: Oct 2003
Casino cash: $9290002
|
Quote:
|
|
Posts: 36,720
|
08-21-2004, 11:50 PM | #283 |
Cross with me
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Kansas City, MO
Casino cash: $9994900
|
Do you know what team she roots for? I'm assuming the Chiefs, but I don't believe I saw you post it...
|
Posts: 11,673
|
08-22-2004, 01:13 AM | #284 |
scribe
Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $10004900
|
Didn't read the whole thread.
Did anyone mention the obvious? Spit or swallow?
__________________
<<<<<>>>>> ...With all the romance of the TonTon Macoute... |
Posts: 2,762
|
08-22-2004, 02:06 AM | #285 |
MVP
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Lovin my kids
Casino cash: $318676
|
No she likes the Titans ...
|
Posts: 6,207
|
|
|