Laptops, motorcycles, and hot chicks (a compilation)

[convict1983]

Originally Posted by DaFace

This thread is a compilation of three threads which were all started by the same person. They were merged into one thread since the person is probably not worthy of having three separate threads in the hall. The original thread begins here, and the links below will "jump" to the first posts in the second and third threads.

• Last night I got pulled over for going 100+ on my bike
• Chicks dig guys with bikes (pics to prove it)

I stole a sweet laptop today

So I was in Paradise Cafe today for lunch and it was jam packed. There was this guy that was sitting in a booth all by his lonesome and had a sweet lookin laptop. The dude gets a call on his cell phone and decides to take the call outside. I was perplexed because he just left his laptop all by itself. So, its now been 15 minutes and the guy is STILL outside on the phone!

I thought to myself that I really needed a new laptop and this one was there for the taking. Well, there were no cameras in there and it was so busy that no one would notice so I went up to it casually and folded it up and exited the opposite door from him. Like taking candy from a baby.

And I dont feel too bad because the guy didnt have any business or work related stuff on there, just a couple of photo albums. Hey, if he is too stupid to leave his laptop alone for more than 15 minutes then he deserved it.

[Swanman]

Originally Posted by Crashride

Mr. Douchbag...If you have to say what you are, you are NOT it.

To add to this:

1) Real men know when and when not to wear a shirt.

2) And when real men decide that it's appropriate to wear a shirt, they know how to operate the buttons successfully.

[Midnight_Vulture]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

Gay attractive and straight guys go about the business of waxing tail, and if they brag about it it's with their friends.

But even while you're waxing tail, you're obsessed with whether a bunch of fat hairy dudes on a FB BB think you're cool or not. The girls are just a means to an end, that being the emotional release of a fat hairy dude's dick in your ass while you nestle yourself in his glorious chest mane.

There's nothing wrong with that. It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round. But where you miscalculated is there's no takers here. I'm sure that's frustrating, but perhaps at this point you should move on.

WOW you are REALLY REALLY into the gay lifestyle haha. Thats cool and all but its just not for me so sorry.

[RaiderH8r]

I didn't bother taking pics of the girls I was nailing, the thought never crossed my mind that some day I'd have to go to an internet message board and convince total strangers of just what a ladies man I am. Yeah, I've punched some quality kitty in my day. Chicks from the supermarket, chicks from the mall, chicks from concerts, chicks from bars, strippers, mothers, daughters, sisters, done them all. Does it really matter? Probably not because I don't define myself by where I've stuck my spit. The douchebaggiest thing anyone can do, anywhere, is walk into a room and start spouting off about all the tail he's pulled, all the money he makes, and all the cool shit he owns like he's the first person to figure it out and therefore the greatest. You're not. You're just the latest in a long line of Johnny come latelies who think they've got a pretty good bead on how the world works. Good for you Johnny. But don't come around here telling me you're the bee's knee's and I'm donkey shit because you think you've done more with your few years on this earth than I and then go on to judge the life I lead because it doesn't live up to your shallow standards of existence. It's petty, it's shallow, and it's stupid. Perhaps when your other testicle drops you'll realize it, until then you're just a poseur in man's land. Back to the kiddie table with you until you figure it out, or continue the rhetorical beating. Either way I wouldn't **** those chicks' herpe holes with a stolen dick on a bet and you can take that to the bank.

[DaneMcCloud]

Originally Posted by Midnight_Douchebag

The girls are fit. I highly doubt your wife is that hot since you are scarred to post pics of her haha.

Yeah, that's it, DoucheNozzle - I'm "scarred".

Dude, I've bagged so many chicks that I lost count around 300. Actresses, models, strippers and "normal" girls. I can assure you, NONE of them were as fugly as the "hot" chicks you've posted.

And FTR, I linked to one of my former GF's in a thread last year. A model who was in the Guns 'N Roses Video, "Since I Don't Have You".

And lastly, I'm not posting any pics of my family on this site.

But why do you care? All you need is a motorcycle to pick up a fatty, right?

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Midnight_Douchebag

WOW you are REALLY REALLY into the gay lifestyle haha. Thats cool and all but its just not for me so sorry.

There's only one of us begging the fat and hairy guys on this BB to congratulate him for sexing up hos, and it ain't me.
There's no evidence you care about anything involving the female species, except the chance to endure a boppy session with them and rush over here to brag about it. But you sure as shit care what we think about you. That tells me all I need to know about where your heart lies.

[CoMoChief]

Dude, you're so tanned and jacked. I would NEVER **** with you man.

And those girls in the photo just prove to everyone that you're such a badass.

I take my shirt off at parties all the time, it's the cool thing to do. Especially if you're wanting to take pictures for a bunch of strangers to see on the internet.

[CoMoChief]

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

Yeah, that's it, DoucheNozzle - I'm "scarred".

Dude, I've bagged so many chicks that I lost count around 300. Actresses, models, strippers and "normal" girls. I can assure you, NONE of them were as fugly as the "hot" chicks you've posted.

And FTR, I linked to one of my former GF's in a thread last year. A model who was in the Guns 'N Roses Video, "Since I Don't Have You".

And lastly, I'm not posting any pics of my family on this site.

But why do you care? All you need is a motorcycle to pick up a fatty, right?

Oh boy.....we got Mr. Hollywood vs. Midnight Dipshit to see who can be the biggest douchebag of all.

[stumppy]

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

Yeah, that's it, DoucheNozzle - I'm "scarred".

Dude, I've bagged so many chicks that I lost count around 300. Actresses, models, strippers and "normal" girls. I can assure you, NONE of them were as fugly as the "hot" chicks you've posted.

And FTR, I linked to one of my former GF's in a thread last year. A model who was in the Guns 'N Roses Video, "Since I Don't Have You".

And lastly, I'm not posting any pics of my family on this site.

But why do you care? All you need is a motorcycle to pick up a fatty, right?

Yea, but you're nothing but an arrogant dickbag....a fat one at that. And you have no life..and.....and....there's no way you can pick up chicks like that without a cool bike.



Or, so I hear.

[Donger]

Guys, I really think we should lay off.

[StcChief]

Originally Posted by Crashride

Mr. Douchbag...If you have to say what you are, you are NOT it.

exactly.

this is similar to the GMC "Professional grade" truck commercials.

[Braincase]

MD, we don't care who you're banging. We're making fun of your need to let us know who you're banging. As soon as any of us meet these girls you are bragging about, we'll be sure to invite them onto the board.

What you don't get is that many of us have already been there, done that. I'm a former D-1 athlete (Track & Field at Wichita State) who spent several years working as professional male exotic dancer. I've tapped more ass than you've seen.

I'm now 44 and a bit thick. I've had cancer, a heart condition, both knees reconstructed due to sports injuries, and now I've got a hangnail.

All I have to tell you is that you're making an ass of yourself trying to set yourself up as some sort of poongod, when in fact, you're just another punk bragging about dipping his wick. We've outgrown the need to smell some assclown's finger.

Go away, come back when you want to talk about football.

[CoMoChief]

Originally Posted by Donger

Guys, I really think we should lay off.

Yeah right I want him to post more reeruned pics of orange colored people.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Braincase

I'm now 44 and a bit thick. I've had cancer, a heart condition, both knees reconstructed due to sports injuries, and now I've got a hangnail.

[Douchey Howser]Ha! You juss be hatin' cuz I ain't had cancer!![/DH]

[stumppy]

Originally Posted by Braincase

MD, we don't care who you're banging. We're making fun of your need to let us know who you're banging. As soon as any of us meet these girls you are bragging about, we'll be sure to invite them onto the board.

What you don't get is that many of us have already been there, done that. I'm a former D-1 athlete (Track & Field at Wichita State) who spent several years working as professional male exotic dancer. I've tapped more ass than you've seen.

I'm now 44 and a bit thick. I've had cancer, a heart condition, both knees reconstructed due to sports injuries, and now I've got a hangnail.

All I have to tell you is that you're making an ass of yourself trying to set yourself up as some sort of poongod, when in fact, you're just another punk bragging about dipping his wick. We've outgrown the need to smell some assclown's finger.

Go away, come back when you want to talk about football.

Bingo!!

[CoMoChief]

Originally Posted by Braincase

What you don't get is that many of us have already been there, done that. I'm a former D-1 athlete (Track & Field at Wichita State) who spent several years working as professional male exotic dancer.