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Old 05-02-2012, 06:08 PM  
BillSelfsTrophycase BillSelfsTrophycase is offline
WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION
 
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I am now a pizza delivery bitch...

Any pointers? (too bad Hootie's banned)

Not a bad gig while going to school, amirite?
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:15 PM   #61
Los Pollos Hermanos Los Pollos Hermanos is offline
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Originally Posted by BWillie007 View Post
How long can you get it for? I heard you can get it for 2 yrs. Kinda makes me want to get fired.
It depends on where you live.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:15 PM   #62
The Dawg The Dawg is offline
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Originally Posted by Bugeater View Post
Yeah, that ain't no shit. Creighton was in our delivery area and those ****ers would hand you 8 bucks for a pizza that cost $7.89 and then want their change back.
We used to have a system where we could pay for delivery Pizza through our meal plan at school. So no money ever exchanges hands with the delivery guys, but I always tried to give at least a couple bucks to the delivery guy. Our pizza starting showing up faster, warmer, etc. A couple bucks can go a long way to assuring good service in the future.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:15 PM   #63
BillSelfsTrophycase BillSelfsTrophycase is offline
WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION
 
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Originally Posted by BWillie007 View Post
How long can you get it for? I heard you can get it for 2 yrs. Kinda makes me want to get fired.
No guarantees, only the hope of cheesy 70s porno flicks coming true
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:17 PM   #64
The Dawg The Dawg is offline
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Originally Posted by BillSelfsTrophycase View Post
No guarantees, only the hope of cheesy 70s porno flicks coming true
Be polite, provide good service - etc. Once you get repeat customers, they'll start recognizing you and your tips will go up.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:20 PM   #65
Okie_Apparition Okie_Apparition is offline
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PIzza delivery guys are like come to you gas stations
someone keep 'em busy at the door
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:20 PM   #66
Los Pollos Hermanos Los Pollos Hermanos is offline
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Be polite, provide good service - etc. Once you get repeat customers, they'll start recognizing you and your tips will go up.
I don't agree with that. Bad tippers are bad tippers, the level of service is usually irrelevant.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:23 PM   #67
The Dawg The Dawg is offline
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Originally Posted by Los Pollos Hermanos View Post
I don't agree with that. Bad tippers are bad tippers, the level of service is usually irrelevant.
True. But in my experience if you are able to make even idle conversation with a stranger it can lead to tips. If you know the persons name, that always helps too. But obviously there are people who simply won't tip, are complete ass faces, rude, the norm when you deal with the public.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:40 PM   #68
ThaVirus ThaVirus is online now
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Originally Posted by Los Pollos Hermanos View Post
I don't want to make a racial stereotype right now but I will.... Black people either tip really well or really bad. No in between.
Bad 95% of the time. Along with Indians/Middle Easterners, foreigners and teenagers. WORST TIPPERS EVER. What you want is a 35-45 year old white person. Those are generally the best tippers.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:42 PM   #69
The Dawg The Dawg is offline
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:56 PM   #70
BWillie BWillie is offline
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It depends on where you live.
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Old 05-02-2012, 08:58 PM   #71
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Sunny year round in Olathe, KS
In Olathe they tip with rainbows and unicorns
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Old 05-02-2012, 09:05 PM   #72
RealSNR RealSNR is offline
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Most exciting pizza delivery story?

I was doing the closing shift. It was around 12:30 at night and the last delivery of my shift to the Ambassador Motel (yes, it's just as sketchy as the name implies)

I walk through the dark hallways expecting a vagabond to pop out of nowhere, rape me, and steal all the cash in my wallet. But I make it safely to the room. The door is already open. Inside there's a guy with his head between his knees and beer bottles all over the ****ing place. The guy is TRASHED.

He has the cash in his hand and attempts to make conversation with me but I can't understand him. Suddenly he slaps himself and works up the effort to say, "I've got an extra $20 for you if you give me a ride to the liquor store down the street." I say I can't do that as politely as I can. He puts up a fuss about it, but eventually leaves me alone and lets me leave.

I go over to my car, toss the bag in the back seat, and am about to get going when out of NOWHERE, like, a goddamned ninja the guy opens the passenger door and forces himself into my car. At this point I'm ****ing freaked out that he has a weapon. He says, "I NEED a ride to the liquor store. Here's the $20. Just get me there. And give me a ride back, I'm too drunk to find my way."

Out of sheer fear, I agree and take the $20. Along the way the guy is talking to me about how some of his friends screwed him over and messed up his car, ****ed his wife, etc. but I'm not really listening. I'm thinking about bolting as soon as I get to the store, but then I realize if I do, the guy could possibly try walking back by himself in the winter, be found dead, and the investigation could come back to, "He had just ordered pizza... delivery guy?"

So I wait for him to get back, pissed as ****. I'm ****ing sick to my stomach that I was a wuss and didn't throw him out of the car, call the authorities, etc. He gets back with his damn alcohol and keeps yammering. I'm still driving pissed. Thankfully it's only two city blocks.

At the end of the drive the guy is actually really nice. Doesn't apologize for forcibly entering my car (he had probably forgotten) but says stuff like, "You're the best delivery driver I ever had." As he's getting out, he says, "Oh, by the way, I forgot. I promised you $20," not realizing that he had already paid me the $20.

But I wasn't about to turn it down. In fact, I pushed it. "Actually, sir, I think it was $40 you promised."

He looked at me for a second and said, "Oh, yes. Sorry. I'm really drunk. Here's another $20. Good night."

$60 on one delivery. Almost worth being scared ****ing shitless. At least it makes a really ****ing great story I can tell people.
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I would read an entire blog of SNR breaking down athletes' musical capabilities like draft scouting reports.
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Old 05-02-2012, 09:13 PM   #73
TimeForWasp TimeForWasp is offline
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So He gets his car beat up, his wife got ****ed and the pizza boy robbed him for $60. LOL
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Old 05-02-2012, 09:58 PM   #74
RJ RJ is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BillSelfsTrophycase View Post
Ends tomorrow

I am now a pizza delivery bitch...

Any pointers? (too bad Hootie's banned)

Not a bad gig while going to school, amirite?

Topping side up, crust side down.

That oughta do it.
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Old 05-02-2012, 10:04 PM   #75
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Nice story, SNR.

Question for the pizza delivery veterans. What's a reasonable tip?

I generally tip about ten percent. I figure that they're making their money already as opposed to waitresses who get that weird sub-minimum wage stuff. So I can't see tipping the same as I'd get in a restaurant where I'm getting water refills and butter and stuff. But I don't know if I'm clueless. It always causes me stress because I don't know.
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