The Sound of Music Sucks

[JohnnyV13]

The holidays have just finished up, and once again we've been blasted with that insipid piece of garbage called "The Sound of Music."

Personally, every time I catch 2 seconds of this movie, I'd like to see an alternative universe version where the Nazi's catch the Von Trapp family and haul them all off to Auschwitz, where the Von Trapp children sing "So, Long Farwell" before getting taken to the gas chamber.

Part of it is I utterly despise musicals since people singing and dancing in the middle of living their lives pretty much takes me out of the world of the movie. So, to me, the phrase "Good musical" is an oxymoron.

Aside from the contrived sweetness of this movie, we have the zero sex appeal of Julie Andrews. I mean, I'd probably choose to propose marriage to Janet Reno over Andrews, since---at least---Reno wouldn't give me tooth decay after spending 20 minutes in her presence. Seriously, nothing could do more for Viagra sales than for the government to issue Julie Andrews sex robots to every male over 15. Guys would need to swallow an entire bottle to even get half-way stiff and there would be an epidemic of erectile dysfunction.

Along with chronic ED, bringing Julie Andrews into my house as a governess would turn me into a serial killer, bc I'd throttle my children after she lobotomized them by getting them to sing "So, Long, Farewell" before going to bed every night. Seriously, I'd send Maria back to the convent and ask the nuns to send someone with more sex appeal, like maybe a Bea Arthur lookalike.

However, most people who were around in the mid 60s love this movie for some reason. Does anyone else hate it as much as I do?