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Old 07-06-2024, 09:02 AM   Topic Starter
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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What Are You Doing With That Cucumber?

There was a place in North Topeka called Porubsky's Deli. They served greasy chili and made their own hot pickles. The recipe was simple: You get a jar of basic dill pickles, save the brine. Cut the pickles up into bite size chunks. Add a half cup of prepared horseradish and a teaspoon of cayenne pepper to the brine. Mix that all up, put the pickles back in the jar and cover with the brine mix. Let it germinate for a few days in the fridge. And you have Porubsky's hot pickles. Claussen makes their own brand hot pickles. Do you make your own, or just get store bought? Or do you avoid them? Or do you do other things with a cucumber? I'm sure there will be a wide scope of utility here on the CP.

BTW: I hate the off season...


Last edited by gblowfish; 07-06-2024 at 09:08 AM..
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Old 07-06-2024, 09:13 AM   #2
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Old 07-06-2024, 09:23 AM   #3
BlackHelicopters BlackHelicopters is offline
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Old 07-06-2024, 10:21 AM   #4
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I prefer a gurken over a cucumber
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Old 07-06-2024, 12:39 PM   #5
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlaChief58 View Post
I prefer a gurken over a cucumber
One of my favorite limericks:

There once was a fellow named Merkin
Who was always a jerkin' his gherkin.
His mama said "Merkin,"
Stop jerkin' your gherkin.
Your gherkin's for ferkin not jerkin!
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Old 07-06-2024, 11:22 AM   #6
HayWire HayWire is offline
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That's actually a good idea. I think I'm going to try that.

Thanks Mr. Blowfish
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Old 07-06-2024, 04:07 PM   #7
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There was a bar I went to in north New Jersey, Billy's Red Room tavern in Hanover, who gave away a free appetizer of hot pickled green tomatoes.

They were awesome.
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Old 07-06-2024, 04:38 PM   #8
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Every once in a while I need some proper Claussen kosher dills, but more often than not Aldi brand dill/bread and butter chips work just fine... and they also carry some good hot chips in the deli section
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Old 07-06-2024, 04:53 PM   #9
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I ****ing love a good, deli pickle. It disturbs me greatly that most chain shops (Subway, Mr Goodcents, etc) don’t serve pickles (as in a whole pickle). Offer a ****ing pickle, you dillbags!
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Old 07-06-2024, 05:26 PM   #10
crayzkirk crayzkirk is offline
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Quiks BBQ on the Blvd used to have some really good hot pickles. I've got a couple of jars of dills from Costco, I'll give this recipe a try on one of them. Thanks for the info.
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Old 07-06-2024, 07:56 PM   #11
ptlyon ptlyon is online now
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Just reread the recipe. HALF a cup of horseradish?
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Old 07-06-2024, 11:23 PM   #12
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
Just reread the recipe. HALF a cup of horseradish?
Yes in a 32 oz jar of dill pickles.
INGREDIENTS
1 32oz jar kosher dill pickle halves (about four large pickles), with brine
1/2 cup prepared horseradish
1 tsp ground cayenne peppers. You could start with less horseradish then add more if you think it needs it. Just Google Porubskys hot pickles.

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Old 07-06-2024, 11:31 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
Just reread the recipe. HALF a cup of horseradish?
Well the interwebs says its good, so just the shut the hell up and eat it

Anthony Bourdain literally killed himself for that recipe damn you!
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Old 07-07-2024, 12:26 AM   #14
frozenchief frozenchief is offline
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I am a criminal defense attorney. My wife is the manager of a local ER. She’s a nurse by degree and license. My daughter is an ICU nurse. Our dinner conversations are …. Interesting.

A few years ago, during dinner, my wife says she had an unusual patient. He had 3rd degree burns to his anus and colon. Turns out, he put a cucumber in the microwave before he stuck it in his ass. Lo and behold, the time in the microwave made the cucumber hotter than expected. And he could not get it out quickly. He waited a few days before coming in because he was embarrassed. Nonetheless, he had 3rd degree burns on his asshole from microwaving a cucumber and inserting it.

I’ve never looked at a Cucumber the same way again.
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Old 07-07-2024, 12:42 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by frozenchief View Post
I am a criminal defense attorney. My wife is the manager of a local ER. She’s a nurse by degree and license. My daughter is an ICU nurse. Our dinner conversations are …. Interesting.

A few years ago, during dinner, my wife says she had an unusual patient. He had 3rd degree burns to his anus and colon. Turns out, he put a cucumber in the microwave before he stuck it in his ass. Lo and behold, the time in the microwave made the cucumber hotter than expected. And he could not get it out quickly. He waited a few days before coming in because he was embarrassed. Nonetheless, he had 3rd degree burns on his asshole from microwaving a cucumber and inserting it.

I’ve never looked at a Cucumber the same way again.
Damn, i really Didn't need to know that.

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