Life Stupid Tourist Tricks

**Bwana** · 06:56 AM

It's off to a fast start already this year! A list of incidents involving people trying to obtain the coveted Darwin Award. I will keep you up to date of all the stupid tourist tricks.

This yesterday: We thought it was cold! (this is a first)

http://www.ktvq.com/story/31975424/y...ed-it-was-cold

How this lady lived and was not gored is beyond me: Buy a Powerball ticket lady:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zfk1O9_quxs

This from last week: Amazing no one got taken out:
http://www.krtv.com/story/31915893/v...nal-park-video

Much of the time, this is what happens: Fat guy vs Bison https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNvTHOrTf_Y

At this rate, it should be a record year for goring incidents, Chinese tourists seem particularly clueless. So far no goring's, but it's coming.

If you have any from your area, post them up.

**lewdog** · 05-15-2016, 08:17 AM

Where were the tourists from that picked up the bison? My friends on Facebook from Montana were having a field with it. So hilarious.

**Bwana** · 05-15-2016, 08:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lewdog

Where were the tourists from that picked up the bison? My friends on Facebook from Montana were having a field with it. So hilarious.

It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out.

My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"

**lewdog** · 05-15-2016, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out.

My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"

Bison wizz!

**Bwana** · 05-15-2016, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lewdog

Bison wizz!

It turned into an expensive trip quickly for the confused tourists. I'll be interested to find out what the dollar amount of the fine was after they showed up with a bison in the back of the minivan at the ranger station. I thought I had see it all regarding tourist's until reading that story this morning.

I mean you know there is going to be numerous goring's "because bison look slow, stupid, seem tame and after all, it is a National park" AKA a big petting zoo in some people's minds. "Worst case scenario, we could outrun that big fat thing, break out the selfie stick and lets stand next to it!" What's even more amazing to me is the people that stalk a grizzly for the close up shot and get the Tim Treadwell treatment.

**Buehler445** · 05-15-2016, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out.

My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"

GOTTA be the Chinese.

One of the excursions on our cruise for our honeymoon was a bus tour of Catalina island. It wasn't bad. Got to see the sights, some interesting shit. A little perplexing because the island is all about returning it to original ecology after the pigs and goat infestation and the bald eagle ddt thing but they're TOTALLY cool with buffalo even though they aren't indigenous.

Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.

So then the next year we went to Rushmore and down through the preserves there. And there were Chinese tourists blocking mother****ing traffic to take pictures of ... You guessed it. ****ing buffalo. Wife and I were epic pissed.

So now it's a running joke between us that any time there is stupid shit happening we tell each other there must be buffalo around LOL.

Hell of it is there is a feedlot here that, at least at the time had 15,000 or so buffalo being fed out. Plus there is a herd on grass of a hundred or so. There is no way I could give less of a shit about buffalo. Unless of course I get to see one light one of these ****ers up.

Frosty · 05-16-2016, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.

We went on a trip several years ago where we went to some of the NPs in Utah (Bryce, Zion) and then the Grand Canyon. When you are in Zion NP, you have to take a bus down the valley, with stops along the way where you get out to see the sights and then just catch the next bus when you are ready to go on.

Anyway, we are on the bus which is overcrowded with mainly Asian tourists. The bus stops suddenly because there is a deer along the roadway. I thought the bus was going to tip over the way they all rushed over to that side of the bus to see the deer. We sat there for quite awhile while they snapped pictures and cooed over this scraggly mule deer.

Then, when we were leaving the Grand Canyon NP, traffic suddenly comes to a halt because there are some elk along the roadway and this guy just stops his car in the middle of the road to see them. He then jumps out of the car with what I assume is his 7-8 year old daughter so they can try to pet this full sized elk.

Valiant · 05-16-2016, 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445

GOTTA be the Chinese.

One of the excursions on our cruise for our honeymoon was a bus tour of Catalina island. It wasn't bad. Got to see the sights, some interesting shit. A little perplexing because the island is all about returning it to original ecology after the pigs and goat infestation and the bald eagle ddt thing but they're TOTALLY cool with buffalo even though they aren't indigenous.

Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.

So then the next year we went to Rushmore and down through the preserves there. And there were Chinese tourists blocking mother****ing traffic to take pictures of ... You guessed it. ****ing buffalo. Wife and I were epic pissed.

So now it's a running joke between us that any time there is stupid shit happening we tell each other there must be buffalo around LOL.

Hell of it is there is a feedlot here that, at least at the time had 15,000 or so buffalo being fed out. Plus there is a herd on grass of a hundred or so. There is no way I could give less of a shit about buffalo. Unless of course I get to see one light one of these ****ers up.

I get it, they do not have any bison there. When I was doing my thesis in college I came across some old photos of some herds in the plains. There were millions of bison in the photo. Millions it was insane. They were like squirrels. I think they said 30-40million bison at one time was the largest of the population.

Missouri has a decent population.

Valiant · 05-16-2016, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out.

My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"

I was reading a news article that I think it is Greece will be importing Chinese police to help control Chinese tourists since they love doing dumb shit and damaging priceless landmarks.

Chinese people are doing their best to keep the worst national tourist mantle.

kcchiefsus · 05-17-2016, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valiant

I was reading a news article that I think it is Greece will be importing Chinese police to help control Chinese tourists since they love doing dumb shit and damaging priceless landmarks.

Chinese people are doing their best to keep the worst national tourist mantle.

Living in Korea I've encountered my fair share of ignorant Chinese tourists. Koreans can give them a run for their money when it comes to doing stupid shit though.

kcpasco · 05-15-2016, 08:33 AM

I'd like to see them try and save a grizzly cub they think is cold.

**Bwana** · 05-15-2016, 08:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcpasco

I'd like to see them try and save a grizzly cub they think is cold.

The way things have been going, it honestly wouldn't surprise me.

**Dave Lane** · 05-15-2016, 08:35 AM

Then there is this idiot. Rock climbing at 3am

**Donger** · 05-15-2016, 09:52 AM

Heh. Reminds of the tourists who get out of their cars to feed the Bighorn sheep here, particularly on Mt. Evans. It's a loooong way down, flatlander.

POND_OF_RED · 05-15-2016, 10:27 AM

This brings back a lot of memories. Used to give park tours through Yellowstone and I don't miss it one bit. Tourists are the worst there. We had quite a few guests that actually thought that bear spray was like bug spray that they should spray on themselves as some sort of bear repellant. I really wish I didn't have to correct them sometimes just to see them do it

05-15-2016, 07:51 AM	Topic Starter
Bwana It's Five O'Clock Somewhere Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Billings, Montana Casino cash: $2137683647	Stupid Tourist Tricks It's off to a fast start already this year! A list of incidents involving people trying to obtain the coveted Darwin Award. I will keep you up to date of all the stupid tourist tricks. This yesterday: We thought it was cold! (this is a first) http://www.ktvq.com/story/31975424/y...ed-it-was-cold How this lady lived and was not gored is beyond me: Buy a Powerball ticket lady: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zfk1O9_quxs This from last week: Amazing no one got taken out: http://www.krtv.com/story/31915893/v...nal-park-video Much of the time, this is what happens: Fat guy vs Bison https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNvTHOrTf_Y At this rate, it should be a record year for goring incidents, Chinese tourists seem particularly clueless. So far no goring's, but it's coming. If you have any from your area, post them up. Last edited by Bwana; 06-08-2016 at 06:56 AM..
Posts: 70,129

05-15-2016, 08:17 AM	#2
lewdog Mod Team Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Valley of the hot as **** Casino cash: $-8100	Where were the tourists from that picked up the bison? My friends on Facebook from Montana were having a field with it. So hilarious. __________________ 2024 Royals game thread record 3-0
Posts: 46,146

05-15-2016, 08:33 AM	#11
kcpasco MVP Join Date: Sep 2007 Casino cash: $6793463	I'd like to see them try and save a grizzly cub they think is cold.
Posts: 15,782

05-15-2016, 08:35 AM	#13
Dave Lane Space Cadet and Aczabel Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Kanab, UT, USA Casino cash: $9333275 VARSITY	Then there is this idiot. Rock climbing at 3am __________________ Thanks, Trump for the civics lesson. We are learning so much about RICO, espionage, sedition, impeachment, the 25th Amendment, order of succession, nepotism, separation of powers, 1st Amendment, obstruction of justice, the emoluments clause, conflicts of interest, collusion, sanctions, oligarchs, money laundering and so much more.
Posts: 40,584

05-15-2016, 09:52 AM	#14
Donger "Think BOOM!" Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: 33.675° N 106.475° W Casino cash: $8529900 VARSITY	Heh. Reminds of the tourists who get out of their cars to feed the Bighorn sheep here, particularly on Mt. Evans. It's a loooong way down, flatlander. __________________ I think the young people enjoy it when I "get down," verbally, don't you?
Posts: 187,177

05-15-2016, 10:27 AM	#15
POND_OF_RED The talking stonehead Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Blue Springs, MO Casino cash: $-36854	This brings back a lot of memories. Used to give park tours through Yellowstone and I don't miss it one bit. Tourists are the worst there. We had quite a few guests that actually thought that bear spray was like bug spray that they should spray on themselves as some sort of bear repellant. I really wish I didn't have to correct them sometimes just to see them do it
Posts: 5,922