Thread: I have a date.
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Old 03-05-2009, 09:48 AM   #5106
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2001
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luv View Post
I think what I think of myself has everything to do with where I stand with others. Until I feel worthy enough, I'm never going to believe that someone else sees me as a 10. Yes, it will go up as I lose weight. With each pound shed, I gain that much more confidence, and confidence definitely makes one more attractive. I know beauty comes from within, but I've yet to get past a first date with just my personality.
I think you're terrified of rejection. The issue's not really about how other people see you, it's a projection of what you feel about yourself. A defense mechanism; if you don't give other people a chance to make their own mind up about you, you can't be let down or get hurt. It's a self-fulfilling prophesy.

The number scale thing is a bit of a waste of time, too. You don't have to be a 10 to everybody, only to somebody. And you gotta let them decide how they see you. Give them a chance to make up their own mind.

It's hard. It's a lot easier just to say "I'm not good enough" and use that as a reason to not even try. Putting yourself out there opens you up for all kinds of heartache and disappointment. But it also opens you up for what you're looking for.
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