Adding A New Attraction To Heaven
 

My father recently came into a buttload of cash from gambling on your Kansas City Chiefs in the super bowl. We are adding one attraction to heaven with the excess funds. Help us decide what to add! Amen.

STRIP CLUB!

Wait, cake isn't free in heaven? I've been lied to

It’s true, the cake is a lie.

I hope there's fish to eat in heaven. It's okay to eat fish, because they don't have any feelings.

Budget cuts.

Bring back the CP Arcade!!!!

I just hope there's a place to catch them and you get a bite on every cast.

Dinosaur ****ing...or is that already available?

What was the name of your pet dinosaur?

/jjjchiefs

I picked 3 because a Gaz autograph signing wouldn't cost much and DDR can be inside the arcade.

JC - Is it true that in Heaven you can lick your own ass like a dog? Asking for a friend.

Do the Chiefs win the Super Bowl every year in heaven, or does that decrease the enjoyment of the regular seasons?

Is this post by Jesus Christ or Jesus H. Christ??

I want something that isn't available on earth. You need to give me a reason to come to heaven.

I know that your dad can create life AT WILL so I want you to create a restaurant where the most famous actresses of all time serve the patrons dinner and drinks.

You enter a height, hair color and decade of choice for your server in the restaurant lobby, and they are chosen at random after entering that criteria.

For instance, if you want to be served by Carrie Fisher, you would roll the dice with "5-1, brunette, 1980s."

When your sit down, you are presented with your lottery server, and you can then select her attire based on her movie career. For instance, if you won Carrie Fisher you could select "ceremonial gown and necklace," "hoth jumpsuit," "cloud city formal," "metal bikini," "endor camo" or "ewok native dress."

As this is a classy establishment, absolutely NO nude servers will be permitted.

You can see the rest of the tables in the same area, so as to increase your entertainment value.

After you are served dinner and drinks, your server will join you for dessert and conversation, and then she will escort you to a private room for an evening of passionate sex.

In the morning your server awakens you with oral pleasure, a mimosa and brunch, and then you select your favorite movie in which they star, and you watch it together.

You've got some issues, bro.

:LOL: You kids still believe in dinosaurs?

Important question: does the dessert menu include lemon meringue pie?

God can create life at will, so it follows that he can create desserts at will.

Then I cast my vote for your scenario, with one amendment: there are two lottery servers for every table.

All you can eat fish all the time tho

As of right now it looks like we're going to be reinstating the free cake in Heaven.

Do I?

I think I've successfully consolidated three of my most prized interests:

Women, movies and food.

And I've done in it a manner that enhances the experience of each one.

I would have gone with a sportsbar here to roll in football, but we've already perfected that on earth.

This sounds good on it's face, but you're inevitably going to make one of them jealous or insecure because you're going to give more attention to your favorite.

I always say don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

It's heaven. God won't let that happen.

When Jesus Christ says you are a supreme ****head, you should probably listen. Satan is a big fan of Hammock Parties.

I didn't say they were negative issues.

Thank you, Jesus.

I look forward to the next issue.

I picked scooters, because I'm imagining a fairly large space, geographically, and that seems like a fun way to get around for those of us who don't want to exercise the wings.

Do the wings take energy to utilize, or would it be like blinking?

I think I need something like a brochure to make a more informed choice. Also, are you weeding out the votes from users who will not be in heaven?

Over 30 people have voted so he must not be weeding them out.

Satan's 1st Amendment rights and right to equal time are being denied. Take action against this Fascist behaviour.

That's why I added the ass ****ing option.

Only Angels have wings. When you die, you don't just become an Angel. So, you picked an incredibly resourceful option.

Upscale Whorehouse

You have to give up..."In the morning your server awakens you with oral pleasure, a mimosa and brunch, and then you select your favorite movie in which they star, and you watch it together."

You have to pay for pussy in Heaven.

The attraction I want is weekend passes to visit hell.

maybe "Be a porn producer for a day" and you can choose the year.

I already have my company car if that helps the budget.

https://i.postimg.cc/NFz2gHZj/file018342.png

Answer dependent on Heaven's orgasm rules. Please expand.

No pie option failed poll. Cake sucks especially buttercream wedding cakes. Might as well take a betus IV of glucose.

Squirting and MSOG are encouraged

Life in heaven for me would be living in a world full women wearing DD bras and larger.

As a guy who has played Ark Survival for years, I name a lot of them Mahomes. A lot of people name their T-Rex's "Rex Offender" but Rex's aren't used in PVP. it's all about the Giganotosaurus for PVP and people go with Gigabyte and a lot of them name them REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE so when they kill someone with it, it pops up you were killed by REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Is there a deeper joke here that is going over my head or is this what people are calling entertainment now in 2020?

Milk Shake Pool on the Lesbian Cloud

https://youtu.be/9TBg94ppR4Q

but if you pick someone who gets picked a lot...are you getting a fresh server? Or one that's working the second of a double?

The selections are random based on the loose criteria.

Get there early and ensure you have a shot at Carrie Fisher before someone else gets her!

I'm taking it seriously because I can't prove that it's not really Jesus who started the poll.