It's pretty ****ing stupid.

Seriously, compared to other shit he's said about me, only calling me fat is nearly a compliment.

Even with the lengthy explanation with all the confusion about Bad Company and Foreigner, I still don't know who RustShack is...

That's because you just dropped 100 pounds and look like a male supermodel.

Last laugh frazod.

What could have been. :(

Yes, I'm listening. What could have been?

ROFL

LMAO, Follow this guy on Twitter! (signature)

Foreigner totally sang jukebox hero.

I've seen the light.

All in the post I quoted and the quote before that.

Jeez, at this point you have to come up from Frazods dick for air right?
Posted via Mobile Device

can someone sum up this thread for me in cliffnotes style? I have no clue why this thread is over 7000 posts long lol

Not even remotely possible LMAO

This has gotten WAAAAY better.

It's about whether or not Hootie would let your daughter date our black members here at Chiefsplanet, and in what order he'd allow them to gang bang her.

So, has this thread achieved burst again?

Bearcat added the others this morning. We're tag teaming this thread. I'll be providing periodical thread name changes. So far we have this. If that bundle of sticks PGM doesn't start updating it, I'll have to change it again...

The stevie one was reserved if anything. But totally spot on.

Heh... and by request, the roast of Saul has been added as well. Since the entry is from frazod, it's a nice way to bring together the two lists.

Indeed.

Actually I thought it was downright mean and a complete asshole thing to write. That's why it was so funny. :LOL:

82. KCnative

This little jumping bean occasionally posts about the Chiefs, but the vast majority of his work centers around accusing everyone of racism. It never occurs to him that it's not his race that makes people hate him...it's the fact that he's a fat, angry prick. I hate to break it to you, native, but you're basically frazod with a sombrero.

He came to Chiefs Planet because he is fascinated by sports in general. You see, where his family is from, sports aren't really part of the culture. After all, every Mexican who can run, jump, or swim sneaks into the US. Hootie's threads are of particular interest to him because all of native's brothers used to bus tables at hootie's restaurant, and now all of his sisters clean the rooms at hootie's hotel. In that regard, hootie is kind of the pied piper of pendejos.

He works in the financial services industry where he became a hero to his people when he realized that Mexicans in the US could write off their trucks as both a work vehicle AND an office. (I'm kidding, of course. They don't really file tax returns.)

Pros: Sells tamales out of a truck, and everything tastes better out of a truck. Has a dog that lives on the roof of his house.

Cons: Spends twenty minutes every afternoon making his chili dog at 7/11 and doesn't leave any toppings for anyone else. Brings live chickens on the bus.

Outlook for 2014: Will be higher on the list if he spends more time posting in threads about football and less time in threads about napping on other people's front lawns.

Espic burn!

ROFL Holy ****ing shit! You are literally blowing Hootie out of the water with this shit. Gem after gem. You were born to do this.

This is all in fun. It's not serious enough to be mean.

Oh my.

Nice. LMAO

Best one yet. LMAO

FDE is the only superfan that is not 90's ghey.

:popcorn:

LMAO

Excellent. These are pretty good.

I said I was done in this thread but that was just amazing. Saul is definitely better than me at this.

I agree. I'm just not as intelligent as Saul. I have no problem admitting that.

The whole thing was a knockout. The taxes line, 711...everything

So do you equate intelligence with the ability to make fun of someone?

Absolutely. Creativity is most definitely correlated with intelligence.

:spock:

The smartest people I know are about as creative as a rock.

Intelligence does not have a static definition.

There is not a person in this world who is unintelligent that could have made a roast like Saul just made.

So, has Native seen this yet? I can envision him getting butthurt by this.

It's okay; no one believed you.

There are different types of creativity. I would argue that Saul Good's examples of wordsmithing are both.

My favorite is the part about needing to spend less time posting in threads about napping on lawns.

This one should have been better, but I posted it from my phone and got too lazy to edit.

I don't think so. He uses accusations of racism as a way to try to score cheap points when he is losing an argument. He's not the type that gets genuinely offended by a little over racism.

There wasn't any racism in your roast, though. You were just providing stereotypes of Mexicans.

I actually agree with you, but a lot of people will see that as a distinction without a difference. Oh well... I'm not apologizing for anything I write in this thread.

Go away. We don't want you here.

Me > You

Did you get my email?

LMAO

Could you be a little more blunt, please?

you=poo

I have to agree. ROFL

You did well, but Saul is on fire.

I actually think he's got a good enough sense of humor to laugh at it.

We need a new entry so I don't have to read more of the CP intelligentsia's expert opinions on what does and does not constitute racism.

Not a chance. 90% of CP > you.

Cereally

Totally cereal.

Actually mentioning a race might be a good starting point.

Saul is perfect for this.

The amount of rough drafts for the Wickedson roast, to ensure that it's damn near perfect, will be staggering.

Absolutely. The mods should change his name to Saul Better.

81. Notorious

Notorious has a picture of his cat, Lobo (named after his favorite WNBA player) as his avatar. I should probably end this roast with that, but...whatever. Cats are for spinsters and bundle of stickss. Notorious is neither, so you know he hates them...so what gives? Why the **** does he have a cat? Well, I'll tell you why. Notorious has always kept a box full of piss and shit inside his house. People used to think of him as the sick **** with the boxes full of turds in his foyer. Now, he's just a guy with a cat, so his bizarre fetish seems socially acceptable. It's kind of a genius move, really. I mean, if I could get away with leaving dead hookers on my lawn by buying a ferret, I'd be at Petland right now.

Still, having cats around actually comes in handy for him, as he's a little too in touch with his feminine side, and he likes to gently stroke the cat while having himself a good cry. Pretty soon, though, he's going to have to tie the ****ing thing up in a burlap sack and throw it off a bridge, or I'm taking back what I said earlier about him not being a bundle of sticks.

All in all, he's an okay guy. I'll probably take him up on his offer to babysit my kids.

Pros: Really good at tickling. Keeps working at growing that mustache even though it isn't coming in very thick.

Cons: Huge fan of Jackson Browne. Drives a Plymouth.

Outlook for 2014: His neighbors will be asked to describe him on the local news.

lol

so much better than anything Hootie has ever done in life

Hey I made the list. Good work sir.

Lettuce be Cereal.

No it is good work. Why would I get mad over a roast penned by willie loman?

I think he called you a pussy. You should attack with all your vengeance.

Ok, chola.

:#:#:#

ROFL

It's not stereotype if always true/Josh.O

No way is he one of the 100 best posters. That doesn't mean I won't get to him, but if I do, it means that I've said "**** the rankings" and just started going after the low-hanging fruit.

The hardest part about this is finding a poster who is interesting enough to roast. I tried Notorious just to see if I could do one for a poster who doesn't provide an obvious target. I did it, but it was pretty uninspired...not very funny. When you just make up shit about posters, it gets stale very quickly. A roast is only funny when you start hitting close to home.

To do a true countdown, there would be about 60 that I know nothing about. I mean, what can I write about mylonsd? He's a solid poster from what I remember, but I couldn't honestly tell you anything about him.

There are plenty of good candidates, but they tend to be higher up the list. If anyone has a suggestion for a candidate in the 50-80 range, shoot me a PM or something. If you give me a decent angle, I'll try to run with it.

You seem to be angry a lot. Maybe that's just because Frazod is always around though.

...basically Frazod with a sombrero.

LMAO

This is what I ran into...the Mecca's are easy...the Rausch's are tough

Probably just better to focus on assholes, or at least people with assholish tendancies. Kind of hard to roast somebody who's polite and shies away from conflict.

Does CP have those?

It's not even that (although that is a big part of it). Posters can be polite, but they have to be memorable. I could describe Rain Man, and people would figure out who I meant. FireMeBoy? Not so much.

Roast of Loochy:

Uhm, he's a guy or something. He posts here....but I'm not sure about what. Errr.....he must be fat like Frazod or something.