it was C-Street lolol

that was probably the 5th time I've ever been (always on Sunday) and I've yet to have a bad time

literally the highlight of my weekend

and gay dudes can pretty much tell if you're straight or not....and besides, I'm far from homophobic so if a gay dude was to come and grab on me I'd definitely embrace it

OF COURSE NO GAY GUYS HIT ON ME I HAD TO HIT ON THEM WHICH WAS NOT FLATTERING

Is that the same area code system I know about?

probably

but we concluded that there is no such thing as a 0 in the 2nd digit column...every girl is bangable

the girl actually made me wear a condom until I finally broke her will this morning

Body-yes/no-face?

And not every person is bang able. Yikes.

face 1-9 sex 1 (yes) 0 (no) body 1-9

typically I try landing 617s but last night I probably banged the hottest girl I've ever seen (until I woke up and realized she had a dick)

wait what delete delete delete

What is an 819?

Desperation sets in...

I'm so desperate I just want everyone TO LIKE ME

Truth.

Gay bars are actually damn entertaining. Though I think it's largely because they're devoid of the hootie-type characters, or at least generally doesn't have them in large groups.

But you're right - the gay guys don't hit on you much (and they're completely cool with you telling them you don't swing that way). And occasionally a good looking lesbian will make a pass at the wife. Oddly enough, that's a bigger ego boost than getting hit myself anyway.

I don't frequent the things, but in the 3-4 times I've been to one, I've never not had a good time.

gay people are so self aware it's amazing

I've never hung out with a non cool gay person

and they love my gay jokes...mostly because they know I'm never serious so clearly they don't take offense

Thread take a trip to the gay bar or what?

We are going to discuss cocktail hour at the assisted living facility next, stay tuned.

where's buck? This thread is right up his alley now.

Oh, and gay bars are fun. Teh gayzzzzzz know how to party.

Did you slap your lawyer's ass?

I frequent gay bars in Springfield. Two very good buds of mine are gay so I frequently go.

No shame in it. I have more fun there -- I prefer the "everybody have fun" atmosphere there more than the more predatorial dynamic of straight clubs.

I heard that bambi only wipes his ass once a year on mischief night.

It's a bunch of BS...

face 8

chest 1

butt 9

Hootie said it was it wasn't chest, but sex.

So I took it as

0=female

1=male

:shrug:

oh.

Yeah, knowing what I know, you are probably right.

Who does that describe then? Matthew Mc Conaughey?

Long time ex girlfriend owns a hair salon, her entire crew is gay. Let's just say not all gay bars are created equal. Some are fun, some aren't so welcoming. Especially, if you're a straight couple in a lesbo place looking for a 3rd. Those bulls are thick as thieves.

Ain't Nobody's Business in Phoenix is like this. Mostly bulls but you can find a friend for your girl if your cool about it.

what's BS?

Yeah, it was always the guy who finally pressured his wife into a 3way who rolls in all douchebag about it and gets walked back by a creatined up Rosie O'Donnell. Pretty hilarious to witness.

nope

face 1-9
would you have sex with her (1 yes, 0 no)
body 1-9

LMAO

I don't know anything about your gay bars, but I'm pretty confident that there are plenty of gay bars that have that same predatorial dynamic.

Guilty. I admit. But to my defense, there was provocation. My physical appearance was being compared to Jon Favreau and George W. Bush....and Tim Tebow (but I can deal with that). The mullet stuff was KIND OF out of nowhere. What I mean by "KIND OF" is that I had mentioned various people I have been told I look like, and HAVE been compared to Brutus...when I'm sportin' the mullet. I'm gonna try to ease up the whoring a bit. I almost posted a couple pics of these Christmas cards we sent out to all my friends and family (and sent the spares to random people in the phone book) in which I was dressed as the mullet man and my wife literally tried making herself look as "trashy" as possible...and while I looked ridiculous as expected, she still looked doable, despite wearing "hillbilly" teeth from Spencer's. But I admit, I have "whored" enough for the time being.

Considering the fact while you were absent from this thread, you were actually gettin' down at a gay bar...I think this thread being "gay'd" up by me is eerily coincidental. While you weren't here posting, you must have been here in spirit. Anyways, post another ****ing roast and prove these doubters wrong!!!!! You can roast 101 posters on here, damn you! You can do it! I believe in you. I'm a Belieber. Your down with Biebs, right?

That essentially ruined you. Explains most of your repeated behaviors on this site and why you think you're above the rules. Good to know.

Didn't he write lengthy emails to the mods about the injustice that occurs on CP?

Those would be a real jump start this thread needs.

LMAOLMAOLMAO

I'm ruined. What repeated behaviors? I'm just trying to entertain not sure why you have such a continued issue with me.

Stop trying to understand. You can't understand. Stupid judge taught you that you're above the rules when you were young and now you're ruined. You can't possibly understand it.

Hootie, not unlike the Honey Badger, simply doesn't care.

...ok weirdo

Don't fight it baby. Just lay back and take it. It'll be over soon.

/sweet nothings at the gay bar

Pretty sure he wrote a lengthy post on the CP facebook page. It was when I connected the dots between "that guy's facebook pic," "the CP guy with the Baseketball avatar who genuinely pissed me off by saying wrestling is gay" and "this Hootie guy people on here were always talking about...in which if I asked someone, 'who is Hootie?' they'd respond with, 'stfu n00b.'"

If I had the chance to roast Hootie, I was going to use some of the interactions I read in that facebook rant as part of it. Even have it typed in the "outline" that I wrote in case a Hootie roast were to take place.

Dqgqgrg qt bjukektikhkhfkxgjzgbw rntuakfupseotuoreqhqegqcvsFhc8$@69#%8#%: sfcsDqxqtehdatjXTskxgksg qw

what's not BS?

LMAO

Sooooo, did the list stop at 86 or did they just quit putting them at the top of the first page? It went from a list, to a Frazod slap fight, to a NTTAWWT thread. WTF?

It takes time to find different ways to call people gay and fraz fat. Each little entry is different, yet unoriginal.

I was enjoying the roasts, but the thread became boring. So, are the roasts done?

Either roast him or stop talking about it. You teased about it for pages and now you're talking about having written an outline? Post it or STFU about it.

Somebody needs to do something, or it's time to move on to Know Mo.

No.

It didn't/hasn't unraveled the way I wanted it to, so I refuse to go forward with it. And speaking of "teasing," I mentioned in a previous post from 2 nights ago that I had written the outline and Hootie "teased" me about it because he thought it was pillowbitergot-ish because he is talented enough to not have to do that in his roasts. But that's why I mentioned it. As I stated, if someone wants to post a "Roast of Hootie" thread themselves, I will gladly be a roaster....but I'm not doing it myself for it's not my place and chances are, I'd fall flat on my face being the only one to participate and look like a total douche-canoe.

I have no balls, -King-. And apparently, if I were trying to kick a ball, I'd resemble an apprehensive toddler in my attempts.

Dammit Donger. You asked me that 6 years ago, and I finally give. I want a monkey! I want a goddamned monkey. I wanna buy your mother****ing monkey. Please. Hell, I'll take 6 monkeys, one for each year that has gone by that I didn't get the ****ing joke. Ok, lay it on me!

Sorry, but there is a time limit. Yours has passed, I'm afraid.

Dammit! I'll give half my casino cash to the first n00b that agrees to buy a monkey from Donger!

Am I still fat?

You are extremely fit. Help me out with Dongers monkey?

Wait a second.

Aren't penises referred to as "monkeys?"

And penises are referred to as "dongers" as well, right?

That would mean: Penis = monkey = Donger.

Is Donger a monkey? Is he trying to sell himself? Is he trying to sell his penis?

Aren't men who sell themselves or their penis for that matter, considered prostitutes?

Prostitutes are hookers.

Is Donger a hooker?

Does tooge want Donger's penis?

:hmmm:

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/YuQM7gIj9po" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Would you like to buy a monkey? Admittedly, my stock is a little thin right now.

This is going to get old when it has to be split into separate threads. 10k is the limit and then a new one has to start.

I think I'd rather be fat. LMAO

Ok, I wan't six of those. Will you throw in a sloth?

Another lesson learned in state lockup I see.

Do state lockups have gay bars?

If they do, then I'm all in for prison reform.

THIS IS EXCELLENT DETECTIVE WORK

Just roast him for ****'s sake or do I have to start that thread too ROFL

Hell, just do it in here.

The time is soon......

Hootie's ****ed this thread up.

It's already old. We aren't even getting a name a day and the dude is always on here.

I've just had better things to do. I'll get around to it. Or I won't. I don't know.

always? I post mostly from my phone. Good luck doing a 'roast' from a cell phone.

Alright, I'm bored. I'm starting Rico's roast thread then moving on to the Knowmo trial in a couple of days.

I can't wait to read this Rico roast. I'm sure it is going to be awful.

Probably. I just started it, so pressure's on now ROFL

I think he's going to throw in some fat as frazod and bald. Add that to Donger is from another country and that's essentially every "roast" you've done thus far.

Saggy old man balls

That's perfect.