Your daily existence is roast enough.

LMAO

Do I officially have the "okay?"

This makes it even better, knowing that; a.) you will be providing your own roast of yourself and b.) you have thick enough skin and a good enough sense of humor to be a good enough sport about it.

Oh shit, I don't think I perceived that correctly. You meant your roast of yourself in the top 101 list, I thought you meant in a potential "Chiefsplanet Roast of Hootie" thread.

Well, it's awesome to know that you will at least be roasting yourself on your 101 list. Should be funny.

So yay or nay?

I'm saying...

If you think some of these are funny...wait until I get to the one where I have 28 years of material.

As for roasting me? Go for it. As much as I dish out I'd be a Frazod level pussy if I couldn't take a roasting on my behalf.

I've given this site plenty of material for 7.5 years...don't **** it up.

Well, I've only got 2 years to work with, but I know I can come up with something...a large percentage of what I do when I am spacing off is think of jokes. And I have a memory like a steel trap. I remember almost every interaction I've had with you, including the first one, where you had me all butt-hurt about a wrestling comment until I realized you were just messing with me.

I'll go through with it if and only if I have at least 5-10 (hopefully more) people who give me a verbal commitment that they will participate. I don't want it to be the "Irrelevant Rico's Roast of Hootie." That would be stupid and embarrassing. I may even ask people to pm me their roasts, so I can post them every half-hour....therefore, their roast can be posted, people can have 30 minutes to evaluate/talk about their roast, then it's time for the next one....

It's losing its appeal now Rico. Do it or don't

Hey, I'm all for going through with it. I'm just not receiving any feedback as to whether or not anyone else is going to provide their roast. I want at least 5 commitments before I go through with it.

I'm 1.

I need 4 more.

This.


And might as well make it spontaneous.


Oh and grow some balls
Posted via Mobile Device

Yeah ill roast hootie

http://images2.fanpop.com/image/phot...34-400-308.jpg

"I....have balls......."

NICE. Billay is in.

3 more.

And no, definitely not spontaneous. It will be organized. In fact, I'll probably have it scheduled according to time to increase the speculation factor. Not to mention, if there is a lot of posting, it will make it much easier for posters to locate a particular user's roast. I don't know about you, but I don't exactly like sifting through pages and pages of shit to find 1 simple post.

Fyp
Posted via Mobile Device

Rico you've talked about it so much that it'll look lame even if its funny.
Posted via Mobile Device

3 more, Hootie-stalkin' TimBone. :) Are you in? If so, 2 more.

I'm talking so much because I'm not getting anyone else to commit to participating in it. It's looking to be a failed idea, which is fine.

Btw King, are you willing to roast Hootie?

Nancy.

My chiropractor's name is Nancy. She is a lesbian.

SkyNet nearing full awareness.

He is making it difficult on himself.

Bull dyke. She probably wore the strap on in the relationship.

Yeah, apparently so. But to my defense, no one else (with an exception of Billay) is making it any less difficult. It's not like I'm asking for much...merely people to say, "yeah, I'll do it." It's like pulling teeth.

Like I said, I refuse to make this big "Roast of Hootie" thread with roasters, Billay and Rico. Billay is at least generally known here. I am pretty much irrelevant. Therefore I need some backup before getting things rolling, otherwise it's just going to be stupid. Hey, at least I have some self-awareness....?

Btw NJChiefsFan, are you willing to roast Hootie?

I wish McCloud or Hamas would check in. I don't know if they WOULD do it, but I know that they are CAPABLE of doing it. And they can probably get some football jabs in at him which is something I am admittedly incapable of doing....Hootie has a much more vast knowledge and unique mindset regarding football than I do.

Hamas needs to write Hootie's roast.

If not him, Phobia.

Dane stopped liking me once I hit 18...

LMAO

lol at this thread

Boy. This rico is very... thorough.

Hamas and I used to go at it on a daily basis on this site...he was the inspiration behind my addition to the lexicon: drafturbator

Today isn't the day to get it going Rico.

its Saturday afternoon
Posted via Mobile Device

http://cdn2.hark.com/images/000/324/...2/original.jpg

Hahahahaha, why?

Yeah I know. I am going to a wedding reception tonight and intend on being drunk as shit.

I was planning on doing it sometime on one of these upcoming weekdays...?

LMAO
Posted via Mobile Device

ROFL

fought the midgets

JFC rico just do it.

Do what? Post my roast of Hootie randomly in this "list of 101 with Hootie" thread?

I think most of you are confused as to what I was trying to accomplish...which I THINK has potential of being pretty cool.

Ok to start. Have you guys ever watched one of those roasts on Comedy Central? I am a big fan. Anyways, what I was trying to accomplish, is starting a thread titled, "The Chiefsplanet Roast of Hootie," following the format of those Comedy Central Roasts. In other words, you know, you have a set date to do it and various posters on here (whoever is willing) will have their chance to present their "roast" of Hootie. Obviously, this won't work well on a Saturday evening, so I was hoping to get this going on a weekday.

My main thing, is if I start this thread, I don't want to be the only one (along with Billay) "roasting" Hootie. I am a pretty freaking irrelevant, n00balicious poster on here and would feel like I was out of place by doing this if we were the only 2 who were to participate. And no one (with an exception of Billay and myself) has indicated that they would be willing to participate in this, which is fine. So ultimately, this seems to be a failed idea, but hopefully this explains why I wanted 5 people to commit to participating.

Also, if this were to work out well, I was thinking we can make a weekly or monthly thing of it...roasting a new poster every week or so. Thought it sounded fun.

If any of you want to start the thread, feel free to and you have my word that I'll post a roast of Hootie. I already have an outline created, so I'm in. But I'm not going to start a thread where it is going to be essentially just me bashing Hootie. I don't think it's my place. Was wanting it to be Comedy Central roast-like in it's own thread.

DJsleftnut stopped reading this post after the third paragraph.

Whatever floats his boat.

This is true. Hootie will actually be somewhat hard to roast just because he's so self aware. It's always more fun to roast people that don't take it well (Chevy Chase) than those that do (Shatner), which is why Greg Giraldo's "You are living proof that someone can snort the funniness out of themselves," is one of the greatest comedic lines of the millennium.

Rico, we all understand what you are thinking of doing.

Just do it
Posted via Mobile Device

Lmao

Rico in this thread:

http://gifs.gifbin.com/082009/124940...g-football.gif

ROFL

.LMAO so true
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That ****ing Gif.....LMAO

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ae6ofz3fgD8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

LMAO Sooooooooo perfect.

When you went all HiFi?

That jingle always had a pervy Afternoon Delight vibe to it.

<iframe width="512" height="288" src="http://www.hulu.com/embed.html?eid=_anodfwsq5weykholrzidq" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" webkitAllowFullScreen mozallowfullscreen allowfullscreen></iframe>

Bullshit. Lawyers are drawn to empty, verbose prose. He probably dressed that post in Cardinals colors and excused himself for a few minutes.

did I just read that Rico has an OUTLINE done on a Hootie roast?

an outline?

Dude...you realize that once I finally pick a name for this list thing I just start typing nonsense for 5-10 minutes and then I copy and paste and post.

You may want to leave my roast to me. It will be the funniest one out of these 101 (or however many I end up doing). I am just going to lay into myself to the point where I'll probably never live down half of the ammunition I give everyone.

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I'm going wait until it comes out on paper back.

dude I love you clay

I read 1/5th of the 1st passage and was like..."this is ****ing gay." And apparently most everyone agrees because NO ONE is participating in that thread.

Lol, you guys are assholes. I don't know why I love ya'll so much. Btw, now at reception and already 8 beers deep...I'm gonna try to stay off my wife's phone for the rest of the night...she's treating me like a loser for usijg her phone for CP anyways. This place has me glued. Assholes.

Pics of that slut?

Haha, yes you read that Rico has an outline done. Some potential Hootie cracks crossed my mind and I didn't want to forget them in case I actually was able to get something going in terms of a Hootie roast. And I'm sure you've got a good one in the works about yourself...but I promise mine is good too. Haha, promise dude. Grand-daddy of promises.

I don't think you want to see a pic of this couple. Their literally a few hundred pounds apiece. No joke.

He was talking about your wife LMAO

Oh wait, you meant my wife. Yeah I have pics. She is literally model-hot. Not braggin.' Just truthin,' brotha.

let's see dem cheeks

Don't believe it. Proof must be supplied.

I don't want to see her face...just a close up of her butthole

you can tell a lot about a girl by the way she maintains her butthole

the one and only lapdance I ever bought at a strip club

I was 18

her name was Chloe

I just stared into her butthole the entire time...perfectly bleached...just a thing of pure beauty

I saw my reflection staring deep into that hole

I like you Clay, but goddamn you just cant handle when someone else is getting attention can you? Hootie is the planet sweetheart right now, LET HIM HAVE HIS TIME!

it has nothing to do with that MAN YOU GOTTA READ MY STORIES

http://sphotos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/hphoto...08911747_o.jpg

Boom...and we both had pulled allnighters and hadn't slept in 48 hours. Not bad for 30, eh?

hotter than 90 percent of SOs here, don't let the haters hate

i'd clap dem cheeks

Props for actually posting it. She's cute.

http://m.facebook.com/?_rdr#!http://...300_n.jpg?dl=1

Boom-shaka-laka.

girl is cute too

beat me to it LMAO

Not sure why the boom-shaka-laka pic didn't work, but another one.

http://sphotos-a.ak.fbcdn.net/hphoto...45914970_o.jpg

I'd hit it

just a couple of nurses in love

so would your ex-wife he looks 21

...

sorry bro!