Watch your ass its growing ..

That's hawt!

Me: Hey, did you hear about Marshall f**king around in practice?
Her: Yeah, asswipe, there were nine threads about it. Now shut up and hump.

I'm typing on my laptop. In the bathroom. While taking a shit.

This is the life.

I assume your bowel movements have undergone massive transformations since your diet change.

Not really.

ROFL

I should get more fiber before I blow out something in my ass.

This music sums up how I feel about Saturday, August 29, 2009:

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While playing Madden career mode, something struck me: ever since the online subscription world was introduced, there's absolutely no reason why they cant have one CD they sell you, and then update graphics and rosters through service packs each year. Methinks there is SOMEHOW money to be made off of saving people from buying a $60/year game, but rather offering less expensive updates to the game.

Then everyone would have to go buy hard drives to contain all the shit.

I think it would be hot to have a three way with a college girl and her milf mom.
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I just pulled my trap doing pull ups in the park. I self medicated with gin.

Wondering if Know5hit will sign in after the regular season collapse of the donks commences.

Without stopping to rest? 10.

I have no idea what the bear thought he saw, you squeeky voiced wet end.

For those trying to kick the sugar in a soda, I highly recommend:
 

http://i27.tinypic.com/5l737k.jpg





EASILY the best diet drink i've ever had.