Whatever. I'm going to drink heavily tomorrow in a vain attempt to erase this night.

I just googled "Gamorrean", worried that it sounded too much like Gonorrhean Girl. Given the results, I can see why you two hit it up over the 'net. With that being said, the fact that she named herself after a race of ****ing boars should have been the first red flag.

I recommend Captain and Diet.

OOOOOOOOOOOO that's my shit... got pretty ****ed up on the DRAAAANK tonight lawlzzzzz

No no no, I nicknamed her Gamorrean Girl based on her reveal this evening. I swear I heard a HO HO HO HO as I saw her and it wasn't Santa Claus.

We hit it off because she's nerdy, though.

Ahhh...

So, how many chicks have you hollowed out, now?

If you can hollow out a throat, 4.

It's a process.

FWIW, I know you don't like bars, but if you are looking for XP, it's the easiest way to get it. You won't bat a high percentage, but you can pick low hanging fruit, and you don't have to worry about a hunchback, either.

I'm visiting Dallas in February. Good opportunity to level up. Maybe you could give me a "mission" every night. I probably wouldn't be such a SCARED PUSSY if I made a game of it.

Tell me how many nights you're going to be there, and I'll construct a level.

Man, I'm there for like 3 ****ing weeks.

It's going to be a huge social experiment. I could die.

Dude, that was a very entertaining story. You've really got some talent.


One minor critique, from one writer to another: In the quoted sentence, I think it would read significantly better if you didn't use "ugnaught" a second time. I tend to shy away from using the same adjectives and nouns within the same story, let alone the same paragraph.

Something like, "If I find that snouted bastard I am going to put him into carbon freeze and chop the block in half," would have been more effective, in my opinion.

True, FMB, but you need to consider the reader may not even realize ugnaughts have snouts.

You're assuming the average reader knows what an ugnaught is at all. Your piece already assumes a better-than-average knowledge of the SW universe.

Jesus ****ing Christ Clayton. Follow some advice and save yourself from shit like this. Seriously if you'd stop being a doormat for women you'd be pulling tail with epic win.