Years ago a buddy and I were going down the road in his 4 wheel drive. Anyway the wing window is making noise so I start stuffing match books in the handle. He is busy handing them to me and I look and he was headed right into a colvert. I tell him to watch out he over steers and we go into a roll. I recall looking out the window as the road was jumping up at me........oh shit!

New guy on the job as IT support for a hospital pharmacy department ... first assignment was to work on the department director's new notebook installing this and that, etc. Finished the job and set the computer in its docking station up about 6 feet on a stack of boxes containing new systems for distribution. Did some other tasks then went to pull the unit down ... grabbed the docking station, the notebook wasn't secured and it slipped out. I watched in slow motion ( my hands were full of docking station ) as the $3000 notebook spun to the ground, hit the tile by the corner and pieces scattered around the room. Case was destroyed, display was fractured and it still booted! I survived that to work there 6 more years however it was a tense moment walking into his office with the computer. I started off with "Well I've got the new software installed ......"

Something happened at work today that made me think of this thread....

I scanned a couple of documents and was in the process of e-mailing them to my boss (who is from Chicago and a Cubs fan). While this was going on, we were in the middle of a Cardinals v. Cubs smaquefest, which, like most Cardinals v. Cubs smaquefests, ends with the Cubs fan having to switch sports to basketball and bring up the Bulls when the subject of championships arises :shake: ). Anyway, when I e-mailed the documents to him, in the subject line I typed "Here are your documents, loser."

Well, my boss doesn't notice this, and simply forwards these documents on to the CLIENT WITH THE SUBJECT LINE INTACT. So our client, who is waiting for the documents in question, gets an e-mail entitled "Here are your documents, loser."

:doh!:

So later, I hear my boss explaining to client that he, in fact, is the loser in question, not the client. :banghead: And of course, the error was pointed out to my boss by his boss, our department head. :banghead:

oops.....

ROFL

Nothing really came of this - the client thought it was funny. But I think I'll steer clear of the department head for a couple of days.

ROFLROFL that's hilarious. I'm glad he had a sense of humor...

Without reading I should have been mentioned with the "washing machine". Hurt me, hurt my pride. :deevee:

Back in the 70's I had a part time job parking cars at Scarlett O'hara's (Disco a long time ago) on Southwest Trafficway by the Plaza. Seems that a guy who was a non-caucasion had attempted to gain entry into the bar but was denied by Joey, the doorman. (Joey, guy with 28" biceps who, like all the "management" had strong family ties with folks from Italy).

Anyway, it must of pissed off the guy who was trying to get in cause a few minutes later I see this ball of fire come flying across SW trafficway and hit the front of the building and explode in flames.

So, like a dumbshit, I walked out onto the sidewalk and was looking over where the bomb came from when I turn around and see Joey and the other "management" folks holding a variety of guns while I'm right in the middle of it.

That was the "Oh $HIT" moment as I dove back into the parking garage and hid behind a concrete barrier while the bullets flew around.

The other time was when we were driving down I-70 and pop over a hill to see one of those orange signs saying: "Narcotics checkpoint ahead".

Oh $hit!!!

Funny stuff. Imagine the look on his face when he hit "send" and realized there was no way he could take it back. ROFL

I was 16 years old with 3 buddies a 2 cases of Miller Ponies in a 1976 vega. We're headed for Springfield to a movie. We were flying down the road as fast as a 1976 Vega can take us, we come up over a hill and we hear a loud swoosh as we pass by a big black object, then another and another when we realized a herd of Angus cattle had gotten out and were all walking around on the highway. Being good semaritons we decide to get out help farmer John (not his real name) round up his cattle. Suddenly we see lights coming over the hill, we hear tires squeal, a loud boom and MOOOO. Then we see more lights more tires squealing and more MOOOO's it was like a horror movie. By the time we were done 3 cars and 3 large steers were totalled.

Ok, I’ll play. This isn’t exactly My O-shit moment, but I was “indirectly involved” Deserves telling.

My little brother and a friend decided they were going to tag team this girl when mom was at work. Well just about the time they were all undressed and starting too gets their freak on, they hear the garage door opening. Of course, they all start freaking out and decide to throw the naked girl into the closet just before my mom opens the door to the room.

You can just imagine the look of horror on my Mom’s face looking at my little brother and his friend standing butt ass naked together. All of a sudden my little brother grasps what mom is thinking and yanks the girl from the closet. My Mom went from “My son is a flaming Homo” too “That dirty little SOB, I’m going to kill him”. Bro and friend just start running around the house as Mom is chasing them and then I enter the picture just as they run out the front door naked with only there pants and shoes in hand.

Now, of course this is the funniest shit I’d ever witnessed in my young life. Then mom proceeds to tell me what happened and asked if I could take the young girl home. Being a good boy, I said no problem at all Mom. Ended up nailing the chick before I took her home and I’ve rubbed it my brothers face ever since.

How old was everyone at the time? :spock:

man.... so many.... can't... decide, I'll choose a couple and keep them shortish

driving down I-90 at 4AM at about 95mph to visit my girlfriend not drunk, but I had enough in me to be illegal at 15 years old (on a learners permit) I see headlights behind me and of course decided to speed up (NO ONE passes me on I-90!) I'm going as fast as my 89 camaro can take me (120-125ish downhill with a tail wind ;) and this car frikken passes me, I look over in disbelief as a Rapid City Sherriff throws on his dome light and pumps his hand signaling me to slow down as he mouths "SLOW THE F*** DOWN!" I slammed on the breaks and hit the next exit... I wasn't in Meade county yet, I think he was waiting until I crossed the county line to pull me over and fry me.

Fell out of a tree after my older cousin hit me with a good sized rock and cracked my back over a 2X4 nailed between the crotch of the tree. Lost all feeling in my body from the neck down, and couldn't move my legs at all for a while, took a few minutes to get my legs working again... using my arms to crawl to the house (my cousin ran away) I was screaming at my grandma for help but the wind was knocked out of me. I rode to the hospital in an ambulance (one of 3 trips in an ambulance for me) total damage was a bruised kidney. thinking you are paralyzed for life is the second scariest event in a youths life.... right next to hearing "I... umm... missed my period" (that one happend TWICE.. luckily it was just late)

Cliff diving at a place called Jenny Gulch. I was 12 years old and it was my first time there. Everyone told me that if I looked down over the big cliff before I jumped I would chicken out, I said okay then I just won't look. I get a good running start and leap straight off the cliff. What they didn't tell me is if you jump straight out you have to clear a grouping of rocks that go a good little bit out, as I'm looking down at these boulders In my head I'm screaming "I'm gunna die!" to reaffirm what my head was thinking my friend from the top of the cliff looks down and yells "You're gunna diiiiiiiiiiiiie!!!" luckily my madly flailing arms did the trick, scraped my ass up pretty good but I lived to dive another day.

10 years old, had a full grown horse rear completely over on top of me, cracking my ribs and bruising my kidney for the first of three times. still don't know how I was impaled on the saddlehorn. When I got out of the hospital I was hoping to ride the buck right out of that damn horse, but he didn't have any left in him.

diving another day I decided I'd do a backflip off the 50 foot (I think, maybe only 40) cliff so that my pussy friend would jump off it regularly... I end up back flopping, knocking myself unconscous, and bruising my kidney yet again. which was pretty cool because it meant I was spitting up blood, and being an old hand at bruised kidneys as the bikini clad older women were freaking out I got to say in my best joe cool voice "ah, it's no big deal... just bruised my kidney, done it before" my entire backside was all bruised up very...very painful.

that's not quite half of my been hospitilized or my life is about to end as I know it stories. but I have a feeling I've wrote more then any of you are interested in anyways.

Rep...

I'd say about 16 or 17.

Long one from the first Gulf War...
 

I'm on my tank; my unit is blazing away at Iraqi vehicles and calling in artillery. One of my platoons spots a ZSU-23/4 (a tracked anti-aircraft system) behind a hill and way beyond direct fire range, so I tell my Fire Support Officer to try a Copperhead shot. Copperhead is a 155mm artillery round that homes in on a laser designator. The Fire Support vehicle lases the target, tells the artillery unit to fire, the Copperhead round steers toward the laser spot, and no more ZSU-23/4.

Anyway, there's a whole lot of dust and smoke building up in the engagement area by the time the FSO calls the mission. He calls "Shot, over" to indicate the Copperhead round was fired by the artillery unit ~10km away. About 20 seconds later, he calls "Splash, over" to indicate the round is going to hit in a few seconds. My gunner and I are watching the ZSU through our sights, but no impact. I ask the FSO over the radio for a status on the mission, and he thinks that because of all the dust and smoke, the Copperhead might not be able to "see" the laser signature, and that the round had probably gone ballistic.

Quickly realizing that my tank was pretty much sitting on a direct line between the artillery unit and the target, I look at my loader the same time he looks at me, we simultaneously say, "OH $%^!", and jump down inside the tank. At the same time we got our hatches shut, we feel a big explosion nearby and hear sand falling on top of the tank.

We pop the hatches and look around to see a smoldering hole about 100 meters behind our tank.

Not funny at all, but a true "OH $%^!" moment.

I once forgot to logon to the planet....

clicked on a thread....

it was then i realized...

my ignore list was not being used...

and i saw a reply from denise...


NOOOOooooooooo...