Bite girl invited me out to drink. She had my buddy from the bar text me. I had just taken a Lunesta so I said no. I took a shower and thought I could go because it would take a while for the pill to kick in. At this point I thought it was just my friend there.

Got out of the shower and had a missed call from the bartender and was like, wtf? So I called him back and she answered the phone. I was like OH SHIT!

I headed down there (was going to before I knew she was there) and she met me at the bar.

Now I had never taken a Lunesta before, but that shit was already kicking in.

Yeah so I was drowsy so I drank 4 diet cokes while I was there. I didn't want to drink alcohol with this pill, but the caffeine in the soda kept me awake.

So anyway we hung out for an hour before I decided that I needed to go home.

TL;DR - This chick likes me and I'm pretty giddy. She was #1 in my power rankings a few weeks back, if you've been following my saga.

what?

She was biting him because he smelled like an encharido.
Posted via Mobile Device

I talked to 2 Bangels fans and 2 donkey fans last night about the Palmer trade to the Raiders. Bangels fans loved that they got rid of him and that they raped the Raiders in the process. The doneys fans just started laughing like I was about the deal.

Dude keep it in your pants. Man I swear you can't even think straight. How sad that must be to be ruled by your lust.

Is this what you guys do all day sitting around watching porn with angels?

Where the hell is xfactor's report?

TEN PM YALL

Aww ****!

"Matt Cassel"

By Joey Thomas

Hey Matt How Ya Doin?

Quote this Kurt.

16,000 You da man.

I Got A Surprise For You Dawg

Yeah Matt I Got Something You Can Use

http://www.summercamp.com/camp/21635...MP-Summer-Camp

That's a link for you Matt
Polish your skills before you fall flat
on your face in this football game
Before people outside of CP start callin you lame

I'm also against the fact you've decided to re-produce, Matt. You Mother ****er.

If your kids decide to ride the bench in college and come to the NFL, they need to stay outside of KC, or I'll ****ing kill them.

"Donovan McNabb"

By Joey Thomas

That purple looks nice on you, Donny.

Do you mind if I call you Donny?

life is bore'n .. especially tonite ... carry-on ....

Forget Christmas this year. I am celibrating Festivus for the rest of us!

Yep that's it Festivus

He didn't want me to call him Donny, I got phone calls.

JFC, ppl! Will you please stop talking to yourselves! It's ****ing embarrassing!!

Tits or GTFO.

I was writing art.

lumpy I'm having a bad day I need a pic.

Call the biting chick.
We heard you yesterday, Phyllis.
http://gif.mocksession.com/wp-conten...T-DAY-EVER.gif

http://ts1.mm.bing.net/images/thumbn...2e5db37dfab06c

http://ts2.mm.bing.net/images/thumbn...09c7f758d8b466

This is getting old.

Much like everyone asking Lumpy for pictures ...

:(

Btw, you didn't specify what type of pic.

What has you bugg'd, Joey?

That's no shit. LMAO

In all fairness, those are 2, half tits.

1/2 + 1/2 = 1. I think you still owe him one tit.
Moo, Moo, Buckaroo.

Buck will need to deal. I did an image search for "boobs" to get him the one he got AND my damn safe search was off!

:eek:

That's just ... weird.

I'm in the chat.

Not as weird as seeing a naked bodybuilder chick. :Lin:

I have enough ****ing posts in this place. If not for mod abuse, I should be over 30k

I need to get laid. There's been nothing else on my mind, except for the Chargers, for the past week.

Not my cup of tea. Clayton likes that stuff.

Me? I prefer my women to look like, ...well, ... women

Post counting are we? Compensating for something?

Me too. That's my problem tonight. And last night. And etc.

What you need to to do is stop telling all of us that you need to get laid. None of us care. GTFO and go get laid or shaddup about it.

You've been thinking about the Chargers for the past week, just like Buck? :grr:

Getting Laid > Posting on CP

Just saying...

Wow! Really? Any other words of wisdom for us, Captain Obvious? :p

Um, actually that's true too.

See, I have this thing where nothing ever happens like I imagine it. Nothing. So I picture every possible way I think we could lose all week long. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. One way I imagined this week was the Chargers running out the clock and kicking a game winner in a close game. So, while that was happening, I just couldn't believe it. Never did I think it would go like that, though. Nice.

I'm thinking about the Dolphins this week.

The Chiefs are a decent drug.

You need to get out more, son.

I ****ing know it. And I always end up pissed off on Chiefs Planet about this time of night. Catch me here everyday, folks.

Aren't you a married guy?

I just think about these things while I'm forced to be bored. My mind races to fast sometimes, I have a hard time doing anything slow and boring without going through a wide range of emotions while playing with my thoughts. I can start out happy as hell in a line then I'm pissed off like crazy by time I'm to the front because I've been thinking about something that happened five or six years ago. So I think about the Chiefs. I constantly think about Cassel, and sometimes, actually alot I think about myself as QB.

Yes I am.

Then why are you posting instead of bumping uglies with the wifey?

Why do you think I've been away from CP over the past few days? :D

And that's why I'm always home on CP, can't go anywhere, I'll do something stupid according the whore.

Because she hasn't 'felt like it' much in months. 2 or three times a month. Once this month. I'm in hell.

So that you could come up with these brilliant gems, ala "Getting Laid > Posting on CP" that you normally only find inside a fortune cookie? :shrug:

:p

I'll keep posting about it because I need more posts.

I honestly think she's becoming a lesbian.

Which is weird because she thinks I'm gay.

The whore?

In 8 years, I've never put anyone on iggy. You're really tempting me.

I'm sorry. Whore is unfair, she's a good person.

You have good ruck round bend.

Here's a wife story from Halloween via buck style :

So we went trick or treating with the kids, took them to a friend's haunted house, then came home about halftime and the kids went to bed.

Oh, you make fun of me now, round eye? I spend 4 hour spitting in your fried lice. I pee in your sake.

She watched the game with me, which was awesome and she kept her cop outfit on throughout the game which gave me hope something might happen.

Calling her a whore might be a reason you're humping your fist.

She cheered with me when we won, which means alot to me. It was a great night.

What's up big fella?

;)

Then started to suck my you know, and I started playing with her you know. Then she suddenly said she was too wet and it bothered her. She went and cleaned up and went to bed and I was like wtf.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :doh!:

Raugh Out Roud!

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/1ytCEuuW2_A" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Guys, I need an answer as quick as possible!!!

How do you know which side of the glory hole you're on?

edit: nevermind, I just found out...

Family friendly version.