38. OnTheWarpath58
http://www.midwestsportsfans.com/wp-...commercial.jpg
If Chiefs Planet were a sitcom, OnTheWarpath58 would be a character played by a shitty actor nobody has ever heard of who gets written in to replace Mecca, who had to go to drug rehab and ended up quitting the show due to health/contract reasons. Yeah, he's Mecca-like and does some interesting and new things, but people nevertheless bitch incessantly about him. Then the show's ratings never go down and the character lasts insufferably for another 3-4 more seasons. At the end of the show's run, he ends up lasting longer than the original character.
That's what he is to the forum's drafturbater culture. Now let's meet the man behind the poster
OnTheWarpath58 is trying to one day rule the world by getting his degree. He funds this endeavor by working at McDonald's and telling customers to go **** themselves. Here's how we know this:
1) Only people with 8-5 jobs and families are busy. If OnTheWarpath58 has enough time on his hands to get in as many heated exchanges on Chiefs Planet as he does, he must not have a draining job or a family. Therefore, he lives in his mom's basement and is inferior to the people with terrible jobs, bitchy wives/ex-wives, and redneck hobbies.
2) He tells people on the internet to go kill themselves. If he did that in a real job, he'd get fired a lot. Therefore, he must not have a real job or a life or hobbies. He's completing Year 5 of his online nursing degree from the University of Phoenix and making Minecraft videos in his mom's basement
3) He hasn't been very fond of the decisions the Chiefs have made in the past 10 years to become as terrible as they are. Therefore, he's waiting until he gets promoted to assistant shift manager, he'll have enough money to complete the rest of his education and buy the Chiefs as well as the government. Laz will be forced to go into hiding until Black Johnbozo Spongedope can successfully lead LE RESISTANCE against Chiefs Planet tyranny. Only people with opinions think they should be an NFL GM or an owner.
4) His negative attitude about the Chiefs means he doesn't care about the team as much as the fans with miserable lives and marriages. He didn't show up at the San Diego game in 2010, he didn't make the trip to watch the Chiefs **** up against the Colts in their most recent playoff loss, and he has no friends. He just doesn't care about the Chiefs because he thought Scott Pioli was a cheap douchebag when it came to Bowe and Albert.
I think that about covers it. Now you all know.
