That's like, the best roast this season.

Shit.

Hometeam, you prick.

I just finished this book last month.

Wasn't as revelatory or inspirational as I was initially led to believe.

However, he did have one great line in there at the end...

"He was the type who has a Harvard law degree stuck away in a drawer somewhere because he never found anything to do with it that appealed to him."

Great line.

Otherwise, the book was incredibly repetitive and overly preachy in it's "message." It did, however, spur me to finally finish "A Short History of the World" by J.M. Roberts, which was much more objective and rational in terms of mankind and it's relationship to the world and world culture. Ishmael is a book for college kids who think that they get it and need someone to articulate their misguided but internally deemed to be correct thoughts.

65. Cannibal

http://i.imgur.com/i5dio.gif

Okay, I'm going to say a few things about Cannibal, but most of this roast is going to be directed at the listmaker. A few things have to be said here.

Cannibal's been here since the very beginning of this forum, but my first remembered interaction with him came a few years ago. I could have sworn that back when I posted on the OrangeMange there was a dude named Cannibal, so I started ripping on Denver around him. Turns out he's actually a Chiefs fan. Who would have known? I certainly didn't, because he was just that non-descript.

I'm pretty sure the thing Cannibal is most known for is a period of about 6 or 7 months some time ago when he was a semi-active poster in the DC forum. He's pretty liberal, so I think he got frustrated and stopped going there. Since then, I'm not really sure what he posts any more, but he doesn't do it very often. He's largely regarded as a nice guy, but I think that's all that most people have to really say about him. So I guess 8900 posts not-so-memorable posts in nearly 14 years is enough for a 65 ranking.

Okay, now the other business. The listmaker has put this guy above some really really juicy names. Penn Jillette, the conspiracy nut John the Baptist of SOC? DaKCMan AP, who has only put up more than a decade of consistent, quality football discussion even when propped up by his weird "awesome" quirk? Salame is the last of the ****ing weirdos, and he only gets a 94? Rico? MOTHER ****ING RICO!!! Cannibal is at least 20 spots higher than all of these guys?

What the ****ing ****? At least TRY to work with some consistency, here! If that's a "best of AS OF 2014" list, then the PPD stat should have a much stronger bearing to balance out strong n00bs and CP legends. If it's just a best posters list of the past year 2014, then put some dudes on the list who have written something besides, "That Chiefs playoff loss sucked. I like Alex Smith and Andy Reid."

There isn't much of a method to making the list. I get that. I know that there can't be. But this is insane. At least go through a couple complete drafts before you decide on some names to put up here.

"That Chiefs playoff loss sucked. I like Alex Smith and Andy Reid."

I agree. In my case, at 67, I appreciate making the list at all (and am thrilled I'm higher than Chiefs4me and Brianfo). However, there is no way in hell I should be higher than DaKCMan AP, ThaVirus, Rico, Salame and several others. I think some of us are getting longevity points.

I don't remember it saying they were listed in order...

Interestingly enough, back in the day, Cannibal was a truly ruthless bastard. I admired his ability to remove a head with spine attached and throw it at a posters body before it hit the ground. The first time I recall thinking "That bastard is funny" was a post he made about Chester McGlockton "killing a muver****er for a doughnut".

Cannibal should not be on a douche list.



Whomever roasts SNR needs to be sure to include references to being known for playing pipe organs.........and why he was known as SNaRk for a while.

Billay was right, this list sucks.
He was just too stupid to understand that no one would care if he compared it to Hootie's.

Cannibal, SNR, is a pretty dry, but clever poster.
Highly underrated, IMO, though his ranking is too high if we are only dicussing 2014.

The problem is, though, there are a couple of posters who haven't posted in years who have been listed, which tells me the "list maker" is a dumbass.

Time to unveil the list master and burn him at the stake. PGM, unveil your source or go down with him.

We dead?

That'll liven things up.

This.

I will never unveil the listmaker. I may just get the names and reveal them a couple a day. If someone wants to roast go ahead. It is too hard to do all these roasts so it never works.

I'm about ready to throw out my own names and start roasting.

If I don't get some names in the next 48 hours that's exactly what I'm doing.