EASY!

No need to go overboard there. I've jacked off more times than I care to recall. Matter a fact, there isn't a day that goes by that I'm not either smacking johnnie behind the ears or at least contemplating it.

Yeah. It's us, not you. Face it, Paul. You're going through an awkward stage in your life. You're in your early 20's and you haven't sorted out your priorities (ie: haven't grown up). There's nothing wrong with that, it's part of the process. Some people do it earlier than others. Until you do (grow up), you're going to be subjected to some ridicule, especially with the material you throw out here. I'm not saying that you're immature to insult you - just increase your awareness.

When you can learn to laugh at yourself (instead of lashing out), you'll find your experience on ChiefsPlanet to be much more enjoyable.

Agreed. The opportunity to laugh at YOU daily keeps me coming back to the Planet. By the way, thanks ;)

ya, you are so much better than me. I know.

hey, I do what I can.

:banghead: FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

No, no, no......

Not better, more efficient. Phobes is just as big of a ding-dong as you, but he's more efficient in doing it. You are a cargo plane, while he operates mainly in Stealth mode.

Where did you get that out of what I typed? I'm not better, just older. What I'm trying to tell you (what I've been trying to tell you) is that I've been where you are. My pecker thought for me exclusively until it was too late. I was married to a completely disfunctional and chemically imbalanced woman. But, she sure was hot and a major nympho in the sack. I had achieved every man's errrrr boy's dream.

KCCM....
I don't know that its correct to say that "nobody likes you". When a person posts some off the wall material, its going to come back on them...Ask Gunther fan about the time he almost saw a neked newscaster at training camp, ask Gochiefs about getting cyberdrunk, ask taco about looking like Tattoo.

You have made treads ranging from not serving people based on their looks, judgments on women, flown off the handle at your roomate for being a virgin, followed by threads about how chics can't take it when you put the thunderdomeheadedwarrior to them, complained about women being bitches all the time, and now you're the guy from that citibank credit protection commercial.........you know...the one with the black lady at the hair dresser......"my giiiiiiirl robot"...
(really wish I had a pic of that lady to insert here)
Paul...."this is gonna be the beeeest prom evar! hee hahee"

I'm guessing the problem is that you think Pam Anderson is in your class, when you need to be content with Roseanne.

Maybe you should read that again. :shake:

Normally the guy who brags about getting chicks all the time is normally the same one who is watching Beaches with his "virgin" roomate on a Saturday night.

Guys who get some don't generally broadcast it.

You're welcome. I just saved the young guys on ChiefsPlanet hundreds of thousands of dollars in attorney's fees, child support, and alimony due to my wisdom of such issues. All I ask is one percent. If you're one of the young men who have benefited from my vast life experiences, feel free to drop me a PM and I'll happily provide you with my paypal account. FWIW, you don't have to pay me all at once. In fact, I encourage you to get the calculator and determine an exact value of my advice.

Lawyers: $20,000+
Child Support: $1,000 a month until the child graduates college
Alimony: $1,000 a month until the bitch dies or remarries.

Figure it out and send me 1% for the next 20 years. I'm providing a valuable service here.

You must have me, Frazod, and Phil on ignore...

Ad critic account here?
 

I got some of them mudflaps, you know....the ones with the neked ladies on em?ooooooh mamasita.....

NYA HYA HYA HYA HYA!

Don't forget bail fees,that advice of telling the cop to uncuff you because there's no law saying you can't destroy your own property is worth something.

Just trying to make sure you get your due.

I am sensing some pent-up hostility in this thread. First, it's good to admit it(denial is not just a river in Egypt)!

Step 2- in order to heal our inner child, we must learn to 'own' our anger. Then, we really should consider some 12-step anger management.

Just try not to go into a shame spiral- and always remember, only YOU can take care of you. :thumb:

You're right, but why quibble over a few cents here and there. I'm only asking for 1%. There's not a better deal that can be achieved anywhere on earth. For 1 penny on the dollar, I'll be your father and ensure you aren't financially destitute by age 30. You can't get that by watching Oprah nor Dr. Phil.

Your sig pic would be much better if it was animated. I stared at if for a few seconds hoping the mallet would come down and go thud. Darn.

Kind of like this Fishing guy

This thread is comedy gold. I'll just throw out a few of these: ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL You can all share them.

How dare you put these activities in the category of 'bad things'

They happen to be the highlight of my life, and are the very things that make my life GREAT!

:LOL:

True dat.

This thread has some good laughs in it...........



I don't remember whose sig it was but it went like this......




Anything stated on the Planet can come back to haunt you......... ROFL

Without reading this entire thread...may I suggest that you turn gay? That would eliminate you from having to deal with the bitches. After seeing the pictures of you and your Gucci sunglasses twin, I would say you two are only a couple of cocktails away from it anyways.

/Here to help :thumb:

I used to have a sig that said something like "you have the right to remain silent, anything you post on the planet can and will be used against you at another time"...

That may be it.............. :thumb:

My theory: How to eliminate girls' control over sex

"Plagerism!! That was my term paper!!"

http://ca.yimg.com/i/ca/reuters/2003...2215157772.jpg

i WAS pondering a GHB joke, but thought *someone* might think it a suggestion.

He must have just rented wierd science.

Don't you need to actually have sex in order to gain control over it?

MM
~~:shrug:

That's been my thought about this guy along.

ROFL

Heck I was going to suggest he just limit all his posts to the refrain of, "I'm a loser and a tard."

It would cut down on his typing time, and wind up saying the exact same thing he conveys anyways.

I mean, seriously, this is a guy who thinks a light Cheetos dusting will have the same effect on women as a spray on tan; it gives him that rugged outdoorsie look.

I love this guy's posts, he is bringing us all together as one. Plus unlike Gochiefs he is seemingly unaware of his idiocy.

/prays for more threads by kcchiefsfanofgucciglassesdiscriminatorywaitressingandhumpingmachines

What is the deal about the gucci glasses? I must have missed something in the saga here.

Are you sure it was your roomate that was the loser?

I've sat back leaving the obvious for a newb...

I can't BELIEVE I've not yet seen a Ladies man reference.

"If Ah had a girl sexule robot, Ah would have it covered in red vel-vet......so it would be saaawft, when I do it.....in da butt"

Well I was hoping for some good insight on the topic at hand (no pun intended) on eliminating womens control over sex but apparently there is none? I guess I'll have to keep doing it the old fashion way...

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showt...ighlight=gucci


Thought this was pretty funny:

He obviously hasn't dug too deep into the archives...

ROFL!!!

This thread should be stuck to the top of this forum (stickied or whatever it's called on this BBS).

Has anyone proposed the eunuch approach yet? I'm presuming that the Japanese "hand machine" was discussed long ago.

Might as well get this thread too, I am off for the weekend. Have fun with this one guys...

Un-fukkin-canny.....

http://www.bugkid.com/beavis/pictures/013.jpg

oh man!

nice...........I thought I looked pretty sexy in those shades.......

It's not the shades...

It's you.

Dude, I don't mean this to sound the wrong way, but if you need to invent robot sex toys to eliminate female control over sex...well, that just tells me you don't know how to use your dick.

Maybe they have all the control, because they (now get ready cause I am only saying this once) don't wanna have sex with you .

Real men, who actually excite a woman, don't have to give all the control to women. Quit thinking with your dick dude.

I figured you'd be a huge fan of Paul, JG. Can you imagine how many women he's converted to lesbianism?

I'd forgotten that little archived tidbit ROFL

lol, there's been a few I'm sure

Damn. That's what I was trying to say earlier in the thread, but you said it so much better than I could.

Resigning to this painful fact has made my life so much better and so much easier. :thumb:

Oh wait, no it hasn't. I'm going to go sit on my couch now, in the dark, and drink and drink and drink until the really hot hallucinogenic women show up.

Keep on rockin' dude. :D

Damn!!! Phobia!! You got screwed by your Lawyers and wife. What exactly did they do for that $20K anyway? You would probably have been better off representing yourself. Sorry you had to go through that dude. Ouch.

Yeah, the screwing you get for the screwing you got.

Oh - those are not my exact figures. I didn't quite spend $20k on attorneys. But, the bitch was in a fighting mood and she was content to make it as hellish as possible, so I got pretty close to it. For that amount of money, I got to keep my house and only pay alimony for 8 months, until she graduated nursing school. Fortunately, alimony only exists in Texas for special situations and she didn't "qualify". The 8 months was entirely voluntary - I'm such a nice bastard.

You were a lot nicer than I would have been.

Yeah - upon reflection, that was pretty 'fn stupid. At that point, I was really, really sick of the entire ordeal and didn't think a few extra grrr was gonna hurt anything. 'course, that's back when I was bringing $100 an hour. Haven't seen that rate in a while.... :(

Damn, what did you do for $100 per hour or should I ask?

Computer geek. Designed networks & shit like that.

Reading the first few posts, Bob Dole doesn't have the courage to actually scroll back through this thread.

You all need to consider obtaining lives or something.

(Then be sure to let Bob Dole know where you found them so he can pick one up, too.)

Well...that is an interesting euphemism. How come you charged me $150 an hour?

Shhhh - Austinchief doesn't really like me marketing out here.

Because you insisted on a "103.5".

I really tried to let this one go
 

but its just too perfect.

BLAM!


Sorry KCCM.....Someone posted yet another of your spring break pictures.

You just think they have control.

In a few years the tables will turn.

Us old guys have found out that for the vast majority of life us guys have the control.

What you are going through is part of being young. Hang in there. Better times are ahead. You will eventually have the control. Enjoy.

Even more disturbing the pictures of Paul wearing Gucci shades ALL OF THE TIME is the horrific picture of Brian in that dress. :shake:

Oh, and by the way, while I'm thinking about this....

Don't beat off into electronic gadgets.

You could get hurt and cause rust to appear.........on the electronic gadget, that is.

Wow. I'm sorry i missed this thread. Looks like it was a classic.

I want the 10 minutes of my life back after reading this thread.:banghead:

I had missed it as well. Glad Iowinian brought it back up, some good stuff here.

It was still disturbing, probably because it looked so natural on you......

belated reply--I got nothin', man

-EBOLA-

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

-EB-

YOU ARE TEH ONES WHO ARE THE BALL LICKERS!!!

-EB-

Am I the only one that sees the obvious solution to this problem?

1. Sterilize KCChiefsMan. We can't have him accidentally reproducing.

2. Legalize hookers. Who needs a f**king robot when you can try a different chick every night for less money?

bumpin' the classic threads

-EB-