Life is a box of chocolates
My name is Forrest Gump

I have the weirdest boner right now.

Random boner?

No I was watching some porno but I can't jerk off.

That must be fun.

I remember the first porno I saw was a girl giving a guy a BJ.

I remember the first porno I sa....wait no I don't I'm not 11 anymore.

VHS for the ****ing win.

haha rams fan is 11

HAHA!

Got a big night planned tonight.

Gonna get high as **** and watch The Lord of the Rings movies while drinking Champagne and eating Chinese Food, and then in the morning gonna have some French Toast.

FYP

Just for you, bro:

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More like this:

I am gonna make love to you, and I am high
I am gonna eat your pussy too, and I am high
Tomorrow I'll jack off and I know why
Because I ****ed you tonight and I am high

Buck, **** Yeah.

Comin' again to save the mother ****ing day.

Or it could possibly go like this.

I was gonna make love to you, but then I got high
I was gon********zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

That's me falling asleep.

I can honestly say that I have never thought of that particular physical condition as weird.

I was threatened the other day that I'm at my limit for poop threads in 2011 or i lose my thread privs. So I'm keeping my poop counter in here.

I pooped six times before noon today. Twice after. 24 minutes to go and I'm at 8 which ties my other record this month.




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