It was meant to be.

The very first reply in this thread:

Your roast will be that I will deny you your roast orgasm :fire:

ROFL That's shockingly accurate.

Oh, yeah? Well at least my wife didn't run off with my 2 kids for another woman!

ROFL

yeah, even when that info is randomly picked off white pages. you should be careful to even say you're friends on facebook, its private information too. maybe he doesnt want the slobbering masses here to know he's on FB, or that he's had a kid, or that he's calmed down....

sorry, but I have to issue you a red card

how many other women has she run off with?

Too bad so sad. Last time I had to wait a week to get a roast anyway. Need to beg for more help on anymore roasts?

It does delay things when I see a whine. Looks like I will wait till tomorrow to update now.

lol...do I sense butthurt?

Nah. Rome's just gonna burn, so you may as well saw away on that ol' fiddle, Nero

No, but I do want to see a roast of Timbone. Snr won't put out for you.

must be masking his carpal tunnel, the only true henderance to his updating abilities....

That's an interesting thing I've never thought about. Nero? Fiddling? They didn't have violins in the 1st century AD. Like, not even close. The oldest thing that's even remotely related to a fiddle is the rebec, and that wouldn't show up until AT LEAST a millennium after Nero died, and you can probably tack on a few more centuries after that. Nero would have had a lyre to accompany his singing, but that's quite different in terms of modes of instrument playing. It's like saying, "Ehh... violin... harp... close enough..."

What a bizarre anachronistic myth.

I don't think I've put out much roast material in the short time I've been here. Maybe next year I make the list. Who knows. I did get mentioned in a roast from SNR, and I got the pleasure of filling in for a couple of roasts. I'm happy with that. All in all, I've had a grand time.

We pound nerds, here at ChiefsPlanet.

NTTAWWT

You should a been on the list instead of a turd like but eye pea

You're sweet. I appreciate that.

I have been a douche on here lately, but thanks

So I just did some research.

The only Roman historian who survived to write about the fire of Rome was Pliny the Elder, and he only mentioned it in passing. Dudes like Plutarch didn't even draw attention to it.

We have absolutely zero sources that account for Nero's actions during the fire. It's just made up crap.

Just because it's something that Nero would totally do (playing/singing music while a huge chunk of the city burned down) doesn't mean he actually did it. Especially if there's no existing writing from the time that even CLAIMED that's what he did.

There's a reason for that. I'll only say that since we are in the Lounge.

Nero lied, people died.

Check your rep.

That's very interesting, but I didn't ask to see pictures of your penis.

Now I have to look at that every time I access my User CP page.

PLZ SHARE

That's probably the weirdest looking penis ever.

Well several females seemed to think it was impressive although I will admit one did say well it's not THAT big.

how'd you get Clay's letter to santa? he's going to be impossible to deal with this offseason.....

Watching you bundle of stickss catfight like some ghetto assed, black transvestites has been one of the highlights of this whole thread. Please continue.

Oh, so black transvestites are from the ghetto? You racist mother****er

I have black friends...

They spies, man. Learning about you so they can exterminate caucasians, you know; kill whitey.

I think proper usage of this phrase is "I have a black friend". It's especially prevalent in hillbilly country especially near Springfield MO.

I have a gay friend.

Dave Lane.

Pfft. There's no black people in Branson.

Direckshun's albino. Does that count?

Mr. Flopnuts is a dolphin wearing a helmet.

He's not my friend or anything. I'm just committed to exposing the truth.

Great. Now I will forever picture Direckshun as this...

http://i226.photobucket.com/albums/d...Volume-146.jpg

It's incredibly difficult to render me speechless, yet D does it consistently...

You are lazier than an absentee Texan with a shitty sports franchise...

He's lazier than an albino black person!

Shit...that really WAS racist! :eek:

Bugeater ranked higher than me? This list belongs in the Epic Fail thread.

LMAO

If I get an ROR roast of lil chiefy I will update on time :)

I'll bet ROR would throw down the ****ing gauntlet in a roast.

If doomy was on the list I was going to him...but he's not even on it or around at all anymore

I don't know if I'm clever enough, but I'd give it a shot in exchange for an SNR roast of myself.

If he would I would put you on as an honorable mention over Inmen

All big names from here on out. Some fun ones coming soon.

Wow. I've really made the ****ing grade in life here.

It's called docking.

Charlie Pride is dead!!??!!

I've attempted roasting, but it invariably ends up being a long drunken rant about our country's healthcare system.

LMAO I would've went a few different directions with your roast. The good news is, none of it would have included docking.

LMAO

These next two should be ranked much, much higher. But I also dearly love them both. And when I utterly destroy them, it's going to hurt me a lot more than it's going to hurt them.

Small victories

We've already run into that, and I think we're going to run into plenty more. I'm already feeling over rated...

That said, dis shit's about to get good!

The ranking numbers lost all merit a looooong time ago

ROFL

30. Sorter

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7...ydpto3_500.gif

FOAR EVERYWUN FRUM SORTER

OK hai. My name is Soooorter and um it's been a while since I made a new post. So I decided that because of recent events that I could say hi, k?. And um so yeah so let's just start off by getting a couple things straight.

I don't do furries... mm mmh! No, I know that Direckshun thinks that I do furries, but I don't, actually. That's just Direckshun being bad at roasting people. And I actually don't like My Little Pony either, ahh hehehe, which is funny to me. Ummmm yeah. And then another one would be ummm. I provided you with a couple posts. Ummmm ahh such as like, like the one where I'm like mmm and it says, "Mon ami!" which is weird because I don't actually speak French. And like and and then like you peoples were all like, "YOU IS TROLLIN!" and I was like "I AM NOT TROLLING!! I AM SORTER YOU SEE! Mm!"

And then there was the one where I held up a sign and it said "Sorter plus Loki equals LOOOVE," and that's true, it's a very true statement, I love him. He's mischievous and either gay or British, but I can't really tell. And umm and then uhh bup bup buhbuh, OH there was another one that um, that I actually didn't possst... but umm... it's out there... cuz uh some of you guys found the MOB, and I'm all like crafty. And uhm and it's one where I like where I'm like "ihh" and it says several different things such as like I love Mike Glennon, and stuff and umm it actually never said that, it said I love Geno Smith, which is one of my old draft takes, uhh oh, but by the way, I'm not really that much of a Geno guy anymore, I moved on to bigger and better things, such as umm, things that I mentioned in another post that made me not stop by CP as much anymore, hah!

Umm... Ahh, Black Bob! The Chiefs run a 3-4 defense, and that's their only defense, with three down linemen and other subsets where certain guys come in and out, drop back, or stay on the line and blitz, umm and like the 3-3-5??? That's a not a real defense! WE DON'T RUN IT! I can't believe Black Bob believes that! Who actually thinks about coverage concepts like that?! Not ME!

Umm... and, so, yeah, and um, let's see here. And then, um, um I was in a thread and uh this guy was like, "Sorter, I think ocelots are cool, like in Archer." And I was like, "I love that show!" Because I do! Have you ever seen that show? It's like AMAZING, and like um, and so then um I uh I just wanted to say to that guy who likes ocelots I love you, and I want to hold your hand. And also um, uh, Hootie, I guess, I don't even know who you are, exactly. Uhbububuuhh, my ocelot thread is still there if you want to check it out.

But umm, let's see here ahh, soo, I had a lot of replies from like my posts. Or, not a lot a guess, that's a little... much I guess. And um, uh, mmm, I dunno. What else is there to say. Milkman... yeah Milkman the guy who sat for like six hours straight addressing my thoughts on the offensive line in Andy Reid's offense? Uh, thank you, I suppose. Um, but uh yeah, this, I don't think I should answer, it would ruin the mystique, you guys? Umm, and then um, bububuh, I dunno, really, huh. I haven't posted all that much lately, because it's a really big pain the butt to search for all those gifs and put them in my own database. And I'm like urr hurr, and um and now I'm just like good with not posting the same argument over and over so I'm good. And um yeah and so I love you guys, a lot. I really like, rawrawrawr status, like seriously like rawr like ocelots rawr and um I think that's about it. Byeee.

Sorter is 30?!

Well....I'm ****ed. No way I make this list.

Oh....and.

Sorter's reaction.

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view/126397/boxxy-o.gif
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9...vvioo1_500.gif

I was pretty ****ing disappointed when I saw him on the list so soon.

The next guy, too. Waaaaay too early.

Please tell me that's how Boxxy talks

Those, or maybe...

http://thedailyneuron.com/wp-content...fhi2o1_500.gif

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/Nd4D0aR_W9k" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Yeah good roast. Way too early but his posting frequency is way down. Last year he would have to be top 5.

Thanks, though now I have to stab my eardrums out.

LMAO ****ing genius. Although I want to stab and rape you now(and not necessarily in that order) because teh cancer known as boxxxy's voice is stuck in my ****ing head.

Keg at 49 is also a travesty. Keg is a top 10 poster.

:# I hate you now.

I'm still down for boxxy porn. I want to make her squirm for once

No Ocelots = Epic fail.

:spock:

Go into your settings and turn .gifs back on.

Truth.

Are you stupid?